


To The World I Close My Eyes To See

by felixfrckls



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Bang Chan is a Sweetheart, Fantasy elements, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Happy Ending, It's Happier Than What It Looks Like, Lee Felix & Seo Changbin are Best Friends, Lee Felix (Stray Kids) is a Sweetheart, Light Angst, M/M, Mention of abuse, Mentioned Hwang Hyunjin, Mentioned Lee Minho | Lee Know, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, mention of suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-08
Updated: 2019-09-18
Packaged: 2020-10-12 18:21:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 34,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20568803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/felixfrckls/pseuds/felixfrckls
Summary: “So you’re telling me that I’ve actually met Felix yesterday night and it wasn’t just a dream?” Chan asked, his voice shaky. He still had to completely wrap his head around the fact that Felix was his soulmate in the first place, and now this as well.“Well,technically, your souls met while your bodies were still asleep in your own beds,” Jisung specified, nodding his head as he spoke.(or, Chan and Felix are soulmates and fate decides to give them something to fight the distance between them with.)





	1. First Chapter

** _Changbinnie_ **

_ meet me at the cafe at 3 pm? _

_ i've got something to tell you _

Both Chan and Jisung had quickly texted the other to let him know they were already on their way to meet him. That’s how Chan found himself quickly taking his wallet and heading towards the cafe downtown. As soon as he got in, he spotted the table where his two best friends were waiting for him, sitting next to the big window facing the street. When he set down, Changbin asked him what he wanted to drink and went to the cash register to order.

“What do you think he wants to tell us?” Jisung asked, curiosity dripping from his voice. In reality, Chan was just as excited as Jisung was, he simply knew how to hide it better. 

“I really don’t know. Some news about the song he’s working on maybe?” Chan guessed. Even though they knew there was nothing to worry about, Changbin had been so cryptic that, deep down, both of them were hoping that the news he had to tell them was nothing but positive.

When Changbin came back, placing their drinks on the table and smiled brightly at them, they knew that everything was alright if Changbin was so excited about it. They set down and, for some minutes, no one said anything, both Chan and Jisung watching Changbin expectantly, waiting for him to talk.

“So? Are you going to tell us or do we have to beg?” Jisung asked offended, the effect his scoff had to make was slightly ruined because of the smile painted on his lips. Changbin chuckled at their friend’s antics.

“So, you know Felix, right?” Changbin asked.

“Your best friend from high school?” Chan questioned confused and Changbin nodded. It wasn’t like he personally knew the guy, but Changbin had talked about him a few times before. Felix had been Changbin's best friend since the two of them attended the same high school and Changbin had been assigned to tutor Felix. They were still very close even after Felix had moved back to Australia for college and Changbin had stayed in Korea.

“He’s coming to visit for a couple of weeks,” Changbin exclaimed loudly, joy painted all over his face. It had been a while since Jisung and Chan had seen Changbin so happy and excited. It was pretty heartwarming to see and the two couldn’t help but smile at the news, even if they didn’t personally know Felix themselves.

“Hyung, that’s great!” Jisung said, looking just as excited as Changbin was. “Is it the first time you two meet again after he moved back there?” he curiously asked, his head tilted to the side.

Chan watched as a nostalgic expression made his way on Changbin's face, being soon replaced by the happy smile he couldn’t take off of his face.

“It is. He moved there two years ago and when he visited his grandparents here last Christmas, I was on a holiday with my family so we didn’t get to meet,” Changbin explained, pouting a bit, realising it had indeed been almost two years since he had last seen his best friend.

“I really don’t know how you do long distance,” Chan murmured, regretting it the moment he said it. Unconsciously, he rubbed his collarbone right where his soulmate mark was hiding under the collar of his black shirt. 

“It’s not that bad. We still get to text a lot and video call when we can,” Changbin explained softly. When he realised where Chan’s hand had stopped, he understood what he was thinking about, “Hey, don’t overthink it right now. You’ll meet them, I promise you.”

Chan and soulmates were a delicate topic. He had seen his friends get their marks and find their soulmates in a matter of days or weeks, while he was still waiting for something to change. He did get his mark, a beautiful constellation on his collarbone but, even after almost three years, his soulmate was nowhere to be seen.

The soulmate mark appeared on a part of your body the day of your twentieth birthday. It became visible in the same place on your soulmate’s skin but, according to when they turned twenty, they could either have it already or you would have to wait for them. 

Changbin had found his soulmate immediately after starting college at the age of twenty, the feather tattooed on his wrist soon matching with the one Minho had tattooed in the exact same place for the past year. Jisung found his happiness with Hyunjin, even though he still hadn’t got his mark. The two were childhood friends and had developed crushes on each other for long before the pretty rose appeared on Hyunjin’s hip bone. Now, they were just waiting for Jisung’s to appear on the day of his twentieth birthday, a couple of weeks away. 

Chan regretted bringing the mood down, knowing how Changbin and Jisung often felt guilty about spending time with their own boyfriends because that meant leaving him alone.

“Yeah, of course, you’re right. So, Felix? When is he coming?” Chan asked, trying to change the topic and bring those smiles on his friends’ lips once again. 

“He’s coming in late August and staying until mid-September probably. He’s on winter break during those weeks,” Changbin announced. It was currently the beginning of August so that meant Felix was arriving in Korea in less than a month.

“I was planning to show him around a bit. If you want you’re welcome to join,” Changbin suggested and Chan’s heart warmed at how thoughtful his friend was, wanting to include Chan and Jisung in his time with Felix.

The rest of the afternoon was spent planning all the attractions and places they could bring Felix to. Chan didn’t think about the mark on his collarbone even once again but he still couldn’t give a reason to the warm excitement he felt about meeting the boy Changbin was so fond of.

…

The end of the month came unexpectedly quickly and, as Changbin, Chan and Jisung were trying to organise the best holiday Felix could spend with them, the younger of them was still at home in Australia, packing his luggage, ready to leave the next day.

He was so excited to finally travel back to Korea. 

It had been years since he had seen his best friend in person and he couldn't help but be thrilled to visit the country he had so many good memories in. Ever since he was a kid, his parents had taught him a bit of Korean which had made it slightly easier for him to survive the first months of high school in the country. Now as well, even though he had moved back home and his Korean wasn’t as fluent anymore, he practised with both his parents and Changbin every time the boy called.

With adrenaline running high in his veins, Felix didn’t manage to close his eyes for even a minute during the thirteen-hour-long flight. As soon as the plane touched down, he sent a quick text to Changbin letting him know he was in Korea and he was going to be at the arrival gate in just a few minutes.

When he finally collected his luggage, he made his way to the terminal. It didn’t take him too long to spot his best friend’s mop of dark hair among the small crowd of people. Changbin noticed him at the same time as he did and, with fast steps, he ran to him, laughing loudly. 

Felix threw his arms around Changbin and the older did the same, happily hugging each other after ages of being so far from the other. Their laughter made some people around them turn around and smile softly at the scene.

“Oh my god, you’ve grown so much,” Changbin said pulling away and shaking him by his shoulders. “You used to be so tiny and cute, what happened to you?” Changbin teased, realising how Felix was now just as tall as he was and his cute chubby cheeks had lost all the baby fat they used to have.

“It’s nice to see you too, hyung,” Felix said laughing, his eyes turning into crescents and his whole face scrunching up. It was when two people stopped beside them that Changbin remembered he didn’t come alone to the airport.

“Oh, yeah!” he exclaimed. “Felix, this is Jisung and this is Chan. Guys, this is Felix,” Changbin introduced them, pointing to the two boys and then to Felix.

“It’s nice to finally meet you,” Jisung said, smiling warmly at the younger who smiled back at him. Jisung noticed how Chan was just blankly staring at Felix without saying a thing and he lightly elbowed him in the ribs.

“Yes, we’ve heard a lot about you,” Chan snapped out of his thoughts, his voice quieter than he wanted it to be.

Felix was exactly how Chan had imagined him to be and, at the same time, he was also the complete opposite. Changbin had described him to them with the exact same words he had used before, tiny and cute. And he was. But he was also more graceful than what he had expected and his voice had one of the deepest tones he had ever heard. He was cute and handsome at the same time. 

“Felix struggles a bit with Korean but he will manage,” Changbin informed his two friends, knowing that only Chan could speak English to Felix while Jisung, just like him, couldn't.

“Are you kidding? My Korean is amazing,” Felix answered back in Korean, clearly teasing the older with an offended pout on his lips. All three of them chuckled at the slight mispronunciation and the thick Australian accent peeking out.

“Of course it is,” Changbin mumbled throwing an arm around Felix's shoulders and leading them to the exit. “You can switch back to English with Chan-hyung though, he’s Australian too,” Changbin said to Felix, the younger’s eyes widening.

“Really? Changbin has never mentioned it,” Felix asked Chan, his brain immediately finding comfort in the familiar language.

“Yup, my English name is Chris,” Chan explained, matching the language Felix was using.

“I’m really happy you’re here, Lix,” Changbin confessed as he noticed the conversation between the two of them had come to a stop.

It was when they reached the parking lot and a particular ray of sunshine illuminated Felix's face that Chan noticed his freckles. For a second, his heart stopped and a weird sensation made its way through his whole body. In his mind, those freckles instantly reminded him of the constellation tattooed on his collarbone. 

When Jisung nudged him again, the picture of those stars vanished from his mind.

“What’s up with you today?” Jisung mumbled, not really expecting an answer before dragging Chan to the car, Changbin and Felix already waiting for them inside. Chan followed without saying another word but he couldn’t scroll off that odd warmness of him. Placing a hand on his collarbone, he noticed how his skin was a bit hotter there. 

He tried to push all thoughts about the topic away, focusing on following the conversation going on in the car, feeling familiarity at the way Felix’s accented English sometimes slipped in the middle of his Korean, reminding him of home.

…

The day after finally arriving in Korea, the tour Changbin, Chan and Jisung had organised weeks before finally began. The first place they decided to take him to was simply downtown Seoul, where they took a walk around the town before taking a break in the cafe the three of them always visited. 

Felix felt over the moon at not only being able to finally spend time with his best friend but also to have made a good impression on Chan and Jisung as well. Jisung was very loud and affectionate, that Felix had understood from the very beginning. Chan was a bit more reserved and quiet but every time he had talked directly to Felix he was nothing but friendly and nice to him. Felix couldn't be happier to have clicked with those two, too.

Even if the weather in Korea wasn’t anywhere as hot as summers in Australia, it was still very warm and the air conditioning in the cafe made them instantly cool down. Shaking his head fondly, Changbin ordered for Felix’s drink since the younger preferred not to address other people besides his friends in Korean and when the waiter left them with their orders written down on her notebook, the silence she left between the four of them didn’t feel tense. 

“So, when am I going to meet Minho?” Felix asked in Korean. Ever since he had arrived, he had always tried to speak only Korean, knowing that Chan was the only one who could fully understand English and he didn’t want to leave anyone out of the conversation because of his poor skills in the language. 

“It’s Minho-hyung for you,” Changbin pointed out, not scolding him but rather teaching him. “I know honorifics are weird for you but you need to remember those, yeah?” Changbin advised and Felix nodded a bit guiltily.

“Minho is with his family now, right? When is he coming back?” Chan asked sipping on his iced Americano. 

“He should be back on Monday, he’s spending his weekend with them,” Changbin explained. They had, in fact, asked Minho to come over for dinner on Monday so he could meet Felix, together with Hyunjin, Jisung’s boyfriend. “By the way, Lix, when are you planning to go back home?” Changbin asked the younger.

“I just got here yesterday and you’re already thinking of when I’ll to leave, Binnie?” Felix asked pouting, fake-offended. Changbin chuckled, knowing him too well to take him seriously, slapping his arm playfully.

“Binnie-_ hyung _,” Changbin corrected once again. “And you know what I mean,” he whined.

“I’m probably going to fly back home the day before my birthday or around that time,” Felix explained. He still hadn’t bought his plane ticket so he had a wide range of options.

“Or you could spend your birthday here. It’s been ages since we’ve celebrated either of our birthdays together,” Changbin sulked, not looking like the twenty-one-year-old boy he was supposed to be at all. 

“You know what happened when mum got the tattoo. She wants me home when I get mine, just in case,” Felix reminded him, his voice taking a slightly worried tone.

When Felix's mother had got her mark all those years ago, it had hurt her incredibly bad. She hadn’t been able to move for a couple of days, her calf burning so much that she just wanted to make it stop. Thinking back at it now, Felix realised it might have been a warning for the terrible partner his mother found later on in her soulmate. Nevertheless, she was worried that it could happen again to one of her children, so she had begged Felix to be home that day.

“Yes, of course. It makes sense,” Changbin said, thinking back at the story Felix had told him on a particularly emotional day. “It just sucks I won’t be here when you mark appears,” Changbin mumbled, a bit embarrassed but not any less truthful. 

“Come on, hyung. You know you will be the first one I show it to anyways,” Felix tried to reassure the older, leaning slightly against him. 

Felix and Changbin had always been really close, ever since they had met on their first day in high school. When Felix had announced he was moving back to Australia because he had been admitted to the college of his dreams, Changbin had felt a bit left behind but was nothing but supportive of his decision. Their friendship had remained strong even against the distance and Felix couldn’t be more glad of that.

“When is your birthday?” Jisung asked Felix when the atmosphere relaxed again and the silence settled down. 

“September 15th, I’m turning twenty this year,” Felix said, his voice more excited than it was before. He was a bit scared to end up like his mother but he couldn’t help but feel warm at the possibility of someone out there meant just for him.

“Really? My birthday is just a day before yours and I’m turning twenty too!” Jisung exclaimed loudly, excited by the information and by the idea of finally matching his boyfriend's rose.

“Oh, so you’re also getting your soulmate mark!” Felix said, to no one in particular.

“Jisung actually already has a boyfriend even though he doesn’t have the mark yet. There’s no way they’re meant for anyone else, when you see them together you will get what I mean,” Changbin teased from beside him, making gagging noises at the squirrel-faced boy sitting on the other side of the table.

“As if you and Minho weren’t just as bad as those two are,” Chan pointed out, Felix laughing at his words and Jisung thanking him for sticking out for him.

“Yeah, hyung, I haven’t even met the guy yet but from what you’ve told me you two are absolutely whipped for each other,” Felix teased Changbin, the red covering Changbin’s whole face making both Felix and Chan laugh out loud.

“Look at you two, you don’t even know each other and you’re already teaming up against me,” Changbin whined, hiding his head between his crossed arms on the table.

“Aussies have to stick together,” Chan proudly said. 

At the words, Felix turned to Chan, smiling brightly at him and the older felt his heart skip a beat at the beautiful sight in front of him. Chan guessed that there was no reason to feel guilty about finding Felix absolutely ethereal. 

....

When Monday came, Chan was happy at the idea of hanging out with his friends but slightly worried about it as well. He loved them, he really did, it was just that sometimes, without wanting to, they all focused on their own boyfriends, forgetting about Chan being left alone in his own company. Despite that, he found himself at Changbin's that evening, arriving ten minutes later than all the others, since he had just finished his turn at the local convenience store he worked at.

Apparently, Felix had already met both Minho and Hyunjin considering how the three of them were particularly engrossed in a conversation about dancing, Changbin watching them with adoring eyes. The idea of his best friend clicking so quickly with every single friend he had in Korea was extremely heartwarming to him.

“Isn’t it cute how all three of them get along so well? Sungie too,” Changbin asked Chan as soon as the older made his way beside him. Chan couldn’t help but agree. What he found even cuter was the oversized sweater Felix was wearing, swallowing up his whole body. Chan guessed that, for now, that was a thought he could very much not share with Changbin.

When Felix raised his eyes and met Chan’s stare, the younger smiled brightly, waving cutely at him. Chan's ears turned pink, his own smile making its way on his lips. Chan reasoned that it was absolutely normal to feel shy at such an adorable sight. What he couldn’t really reason with was how his soulmate mark had started to feel warmer for the past few days.

An hour later, when the pizza was eaten and the dishes were washed, Chan found himself alone with Felix. Exactly as he had expected, Changbin and Minho were currently in the kitchen, washing up what was left from dinner, while Jisung and Hyunjin were giggling to themselves, cuddled up on the armchair in the corner of the room.

Every time that happened, Chan would find himself alone, just scrolling through his phone or directly heading home. This time though, Felix was there, watching him expectantly. The older swallowed heavily, sitting down next to him on the floor, struggling a bit to fit between the sofa and the coffee table.

When more giggling came from the armchair behind them, Chan scoffed lightly but couldn’t help the fond expression on his face.

“Those two are so gross,” he announced starting the conversation. He wasn't being serious, of course, but it still couldn’t hide the slight bitterness he was feeling. Not because of Jisung and Hyunjin specifically, just because of his poor luck.

Even though he didn’t know the older that well, he could still clearly understand that he was kidding. “You’re such a grump, hyung,” Felix said giggling, quickly switching to English now that they were alone. “They are all so cute together,” he sighed, his voice sounding almost dreamy. Chan guessed Felix was thinking about having something like that in the near future.

“Let’s talk about that at the end of your weeks here,” Chan said, chuckling lightly, noticing how Felix suddenly smiled at the sound.

“What about you, hyung? No lucky soulmate in your life yet?” Felix asked curiously, nothing but genuine interest in his expression. For the first time, Chan didn’t feel annoyed about talking of his nonexisting soulmate to someone else.

“Nope,” he said popping the _ p _. “I’ve got my mark but still haven’t seen a trace of them,” Chan explained, watching as Felix's expression didn’t change in one of the pity people always seemed to feel for him. 

“Ah, I get it, hyung. Well, it’s their loss anyway,” Felix nudged his shoulder, his smile nothing but sincere. It didn’t seem like a comment meant for any particular reason but Chan felt that warm feeling in his body again, almost as if the sun had suddenly shined on him only. Above all, Felix was the first one who hadn’t asked him about where his soulmate mark was or what it was. It seemed like many people thought they had the right to know even though it wasn’t their business at all.

“You were talking with Hyunjin and Minho about dancing before, right? Do you dance, too?” Chan asked, interested to take advantage of the time he had alone with Felix to get to know him better. He was glad that they both shared the same language so that Felix was comfortable with talking to him without having to translate everything in his language first.

“Oh, yeah, I do. I mainly dance hip-hop but I’m not really good at it,” Felix clarified, his hands gesturing wildly as if he was suddenly afraid of Chan having too many expectations on him.

“That’s bullshit, he’s actually great,” Changbin said out of the blue, making his way in the living room holding Minho's hand. Felix just shook his head but stayed silent, his eyes staring at the ground.

“And did you know Chan-hyung is a great rapper and producer?” Changbin asked a surprised Felix. Chan couldn’t understand why Changbin was suddenly playing matchmaker. 

“I was actually just about to tell him before you came here,” Chan mumbled. He was pretty good at rapping and producing but it wasn’t something he’d usually say out of the blue. He guessed that was why Felix was so reserved about his dancing, too.

“For real? That’s so cool, hyung! You should let me listen to something someday,” Felix suggested excited, his shyness suddenly forgotten and being replaced by pure awe instead. 

“Only if you let me see your dancing,” Chan countered, smiling at the younger.

Too busy finally having his first proper conversation with Felix and trying not to make a fool out of himself, Chan didn’t notice how Jisung and Hyunjin were watching them with knowing eyes, giggling to themselves. What he also didn’t realise was how the skin where his mark was tattooed was suddenly stinging in a ticklish way. 

People said that it was one of the effects of being near your soulmate.

...

It was not any later than ten in the morning when Chan’s phone started ringing, the screen showing a name he didn’t think would have ever appeared there. When Felix had first got to Korea, Changbin had created a group with the three of them and Jisung, just in case Felix needed something and Changbin wasn’t available. That’s how he had got Felix's number, which was now calling him.

“Felix, hey. Is everything okay?” Chan asked when he picked up the call, his voice sounding a bit worried but also perplexed.

“Hey, hyung. Sorry, did I wake you up?” Felix asked back, not answering the first question. Chan pretended not to notice how his heart did a small flip in his chest just at hearing the younger's voice.

“No, don’t worry. I've been awake for a couple of hours now,” Chan reassured. He had indeed woken up way before the phone call, his head full of lyrics that hadn’t let him sleep any longer.

Felix sighed, glad he hadn’t disturbed the older too much, but he otherwise stayed silent. Chan was just about to ask if there was something wrong when Felix explained himself.

“It’s just that lately Changbin and Minho haven’t had time for themselves because I'm here and Minho is staying over now. I was just wondering if I could hang out at your place for a couple of hours? Just to give them a bit of space,” Felix explained, his voice sounding suddenly shy as if he was afraid Chan was about to reject him altogether.

Chan found it endearing how Felix kept forgetting about honorifics every time he switched back to English, only using them when he was addressing the person directly.

On the other end of the phone, the silence that followed was just because Chan was taken aback by the question. Not in a negative way, of course. In fact, his ears turned a darker shade of pink just at the idea of having the younger over at his small apartment.

He had probably stayed silent for a bit too long because Felix misunderstood his lack of response.

“It’s completely fine if you don’t want to, hyung! I can just hang out downtown by myself一” Felix rushed out, just wanting to take back the suggestion Chan had probably found totally out of place.

“No, of course, you can,” Chan interrupted him quickly, the younger’s panicked voice snapping him out of his thoughts. “Sorry, I just got a bit distracted. But yeah, I’ll text you the address. Come over whenever you want,” he reassured, his voice sounding softer than he intended it to.

“Awesome, thank you, hyung!” Felix exclaimed. Chan didn’t know how, but he could feel it in himself when the younger was smiling that breathtaking smile he showed whenever he was really happy.

When the phone call ended, Chan rushed to clean at least a bit of the mess that his tiny apartment was, excitement running through his veins just at the idea of having Felix over. He wasn’t a fool, he knew there was something odd with the way he always felt around Felix but he didn't want to get his hopes up because he knew that having feelings for the younger wasn’t an assurance that the boy felt the same about him.

Above all, Chan was extremely afraid of possibly having a crush on someone who wasn’t meant to be his soulmate. Felix didn’t even have his mark yet and for all he knew, the younger didn’t even know what his was. Chan didn’t want to convince himself of something that could have been ripped away from him in the course of a single day. 

When the doorbell rang, Chan realised he had been standing in the middle of his living room staring into nothing for the past ten minutes. He quickly rushed to the door, opening it just to find a casually-dressed Felix in all his glory. Chan had long come to terms with the fact that he found Felix absolutely beautiful, no matter what he was wearing or how his hair was styled. He guessed that could have to do with the whole crush thing.

“Good morning, hyung,” Felix said brightly, his smile as warm as the summer day outside. Chan then noticed the two coffees in Felix’s hands and raised an eyebrow at him while stepping aside to let him in the apartment.

“Oh, I stopped by the cafe and bought us coffee. I hope you’re okay with iced Americano, it’s your usual,” Felix explained, his cheeks tinted pink, his blush covering those freckles Chan was so fond of.

“You really didn’t have to,” Chan said but his smile reassured the younger that he was very happy and pleased with the gesture. Chan still couldn’t quite understand how Felix had managed to make his way under his skin in no more than ten days.

“Come, let’s go to the kitchen,” Chan suggested, placing his hand on the small of Felix’s back to lead him to the room. He didn’t notice how the blush on the younger’s face became even darker.

The two set down at the kitchen table, silence settling in the room. Chan was quite impressed at how that silence didn’t feel heavy at all. On the contrary, it felt oddly domestic to drink coffee together in the morning, the hot rays of the sun lighting up the whole room.

“Hyung, have you had breakfast yet?” Felix broke the silence, his deep voice keeping the atmosphere quiet and relaxed.

Despite having woken up a few hours earlier, Chan had been so engrossed in his lyrics that he didn’t even think about making himself breakfast. 

“I actually haven’t. Have you?” Chan asked back, Felix shaking his head in response. The older didn’t know what he was supposed to suggest now but it turned out he didn’t have to do anything because Felix’s eyes lit up and a mischievous grin made his way on his lips.

“Hyung, do you know how to make pancakes?” Felix asked, his grin only getting wider when Chan shook his head.

“I should have the ingredients to make them though if you’re up for it,” he said, not really knowing if Felix was actually suggesting to make them or if he was just as clueless as Chan was.

Felix jumped on his two feet, making his way to the stove, and waited for Chan to help him take out what he needed.

“Should I trust you won’t burn my whole apartment down?” Chan teased while he placed the flour and the butter on the counter. He figured that if Felix had suggested it he had to know what he was doing, at least he hoped so.

“We’re Australian, all Australians should know how to cook. You’re like the exception that proves the rule,” Felix pouted at him, clearly taking no offence in his words. Chan couldn’t help the soft smile at the sight. 

Since he was pretty useless in the whole pancake-making deal, he just stepped back watching with adoring eyes as Felix made them breakfast. He had to admit the mere idea made his heart beating twice as fast.

What he realised not even ten minutes later was that Felix was a liar and couldn't be trusted. As he watched Felix turn pancakes still not cooked, splashing mixture everywhere or turning them when they were already on their way to been burned, he sighed.

“Felix, I have no clue on how to make pancakes but I’m pretty sure that’s not how it should be done,” Chan called from beside Felix, the younger pouting once again, looking at the sad disaster in front of him. 

“All Australians can cook,” Chan mocked, his voice dropping lower to imitate Felix’s. The younger couldn’t help a short chuckle even though his eyes were still looking at the pan. “Let me give it a try,” he continued, trying to get Felix to smile again.

The younger stepped aside and, when it was clear that Chan was doing a way better job than he had, he just set on the counter, watching the older flip the pancakes.

When Chan finished cooking and turned around to announce exactly that to Felix, he froze in the middle of the movement, his eyes staring at the sight in front of him. Felix was sitting on the counter, his legs kicking the air back and forth. The sun was shining behind him forming a sort of halo around him, his freckles standing out twice as much. His shirt was too big on his lithe frame and his hair wasn’t styled, his bangs falling naturally all over the place.

If Chan had thought for even a second that his feelings for Felix were nothing more than platonic affection for a new friend, his heart begged to differ at that moment. He became a blushing mess in a matter of seconds, a sudden warmth focusing specifically on the lower part of his neck, right where his mark was hidden.

Felix was luckily looking around the kitchen, focusing on all those details that made the room incredibly Chan’s. The older took a few seconds to regain his composure, before finally clearing his throat and announce to Felix that their breakfast was ready. They took their coffees and the pancakes to the living room, Chan setting them down on the coffee table just in front of the sofa where he had been working on lyrics before Felix had arrived.

“Thank you for making breakfast, hyung,” Felix said, breaking the silence once again. Chan didn’t like how he still looked a bit guilty, probably because he had suggested making pancakes in the first place but turned out to be really bad at it.

“Thank you for bringing coffee,” Chan thanked back while Felix seemed to realise that it was indeed something he had done just to be nice to his hyung.

Felix’s eyes trained to the sheets messily lying on the table, his mouth opening in recognition.

“Hyung, are those lyrics?” he asked, his eyes shining in awe. Chan felt both pride and dread in his veins so he just nodded, his own eyes never leaving Felix’s impressed expression.

“Can I see them?” Felix asked for permission, bouncing like an excited kid in a playground. Chan couldn’t help but find it extremely cute so he just nodded once again, Felix not losing a moment to take the papers and slowly read through them.

“Chris,” Felix called after a while, his eyes wide open while awe was written all over his face. Chan’s blinked quickly at the use of his real name sounding so natural coming from Felix’s lips. “I mean my Korean sucks but, from what I can understand, these are amazing,” Felix said, watching Chan as if he couldn’t believe what he had just read.

People before had told Chan how his lyrics were truly great, Changbin and Jisung among those people, too. But for some reason, the praise coming directly from Felix, the freckled boy he had become so attached to, meant more than any other word could. 

And that was how they lost themselves in talking about Chan’s lyrics, the ideas behind them and the melodies he had in mind to accompany them. Chan had never been particularly keen on sharing his music with people that weren’t his closest friends. But for the second time, exactly how it had happened with the conversation about his mark they had had, Chan couldn't find a reason to mind.

When Felix made his way back to Changbin’s place after hours spent in Chan’s apartment, the older had made sure to remind him he had to show him his dancing now that he had heard about his music.

…

Chan and Jisung were hanging out at Chan’s place when he finally mustered the courage to ask his friend about the question that hadn’t wanted to leave his mind for the past few days.

“Jisung?” he called, the younger lying on his back on the couch as he played with his phone. He simply hummed to let the older know he was listening. “Has Hyunjin’s mark ever tingled out of nowhere?” he asked, knowing the two shared everything about soulmates.

Jisung’s interest was surely captured if him locking his phone was anything to go by. He was now looking straight at Chan.

“He says the skin there is usually just warmer when he’s around me but it had started to tingle sometimes, yeah,” Jisung informed him, his eyes curious about the sudden question. “People say your mark usually heats up when you’re around your soulmate,” he finished, realisation drowning on him when Chan touched his collarbone on instinct.

“Has it happened to you too, hyung? When? With who?” Jisung questioned, quickly sitting up on the couch, watching his hyung with happiness written all over his face. When Chan stayed silent, debating on whether to reveal it already or waiting for a confirmation, a teasing smirk made its way on Jisung’s lips. 

“It’s Felix, isn’t it?” he asked, his voice both teasing and excited. Chan's eyes went wide open, he knew he wasn’t that subtle but he also didn’t think even Jisung could figure it out.

“How do you know it?” Chan asked, his voice a bit panicked at the thought of Felix having realised it, too.

“I've literally never seen you get attached to someone so quickly. It took months for me to even be able to come over, while Felix spent half of his days in Korea here with you,” Jisung answered, laughing in disbelief, not wanting to believe that Chan really thought it was hard to notice the enormous soft spot he had for the boy.

“How long have you known by now?” Jisung asked again, this time sounding a bit more serious than he was before. Of course, he was more than happy if Felix really turned out to be Chan’s soulmate but it was clear how Chan was still freaking out a bit because of it.

“I think my mark has always been warmer every time I was around him but I didn’t pay it much attention since it’s summer. I thought it was just the weather,” Chan mumbled, Jisung giving him a death glare before whispering a “_ weather _” under his breath, shaking his head. “He came over a couple of days ago and he was sitting on the kitchen counter and when I looked at him my mark just started to tingle as if the sun was shining on my skin,” Chan explained, his voice sounding a bit lost, almost as if he was losing himself in the memory.

Jisung stayed silent for a few seconds, smiling to himself.

“How did you feel the first time you’ve seen him at the airport?” Jisung asked, both because of his curiosity and because he was trying to understand something he still didn’t voice to Chan.

“What is this? A therapy session?” Chan mocked, not really understanding where the question came from.

“Shut up and answer. I might know something,” Jisung shot back a second later, already knowing Chan didn’t like to go all sentimental for no reason.

“Well, of course, I was surprised because he looked gorgeous and I didn't quite expect that,” he started, ignoring Jisung’s snicker. “But then I noticed his freckles and I suddenly thought of my mark. They kind of reminded me of stars,” Chan finished, his voice getting slower with each word, almost as if he was slowly starting to assimilate the fact just saying it out loud.

Jisung smirked.

“It’s not something that many people pay attention to but did you know that soulmate marks are usually something that represents your other half? Like a symbol that can somehow constantly remind you of them,” Jisung explained, his voice turning softer.

Soulmates were so common but also way more underestimated than one would think. Not many people knew much about their own marks, most of the times they usually just focused on finding their matching one. Jisung’s mother had made it her mission to tell her son all she knew about them, while Chan was still pretty clueless about it all. He had honestly never thought about what could stand behind his mark.

“For example, when Hyunjin and I were in seventh grade, I gave him a rose for Valentine’s day, claiming it was my favourite flower and he had to keep it safe or I would be really sad. Turned out his soulmate mark is a rose,” Jisung continued, trying to make Chan see his point.

“What you’re saying is that...” Chan began, not knowing how to voice those words. He had had a slight feeling, or at least hope, for Felix to actually be his soulmate but having Jisung point out all the proofs to his hypothesis was still a bit overwhelming.

“What I'm saying is that I believe you were reminded of your mark when you met him because the stars you have tattooed should be a representation of Felix’s freckles. Your soulmate’s freckles,” Jisung announced, his voice gentle but sure. 

Chan stayed silent, the words had made him freeze. He was happy, absolutely ecstatic, but at the same time, he was now absolutely clueless about what he was supposed to do with the new information. 

“Felix is going back to Australia in three days and he’s getting his mark only two days after that. I think you should tell him before he leaves,” Jisung suggested gently, just voicing his own opinion.

“I don’t think so, Jisung-ah. I mean, we aren’t that close yet. I can’t just go over to him and blurt out I'm his soulmate. I think I should wait for him to get his tattoo and when I’ll be sure this is for real I'm going to tell him,” Chan decided, not liking the idea that much but believing there was nothing else he could do.

“You’re going to tell him you’re his soulmate over the phone?” Jisung asked frowning a bit. It wasn’t like he was judging or anything else, it just felt a bit wrong.

“Don’t look at me like that, I don’t like it either. It’s the only thing I can do to let him enjoy these last few days he has here with Changbin,” Chan confessed, his voice taking a light sad tint, not really enjoying the fact of lying to Felix and waste the chance he had to spend time with his soulmate face to face.

“Whatever you decide to do, I'm here for you, hyung. And I'm sure Felix is going to feel the same,” Jisung reassured, his smile making Chan feel a bit better about this whole deal.

For now, Chan tried to focus on other things as long as they could stop his mind from thinking about those adorable freckles covering Felix’s cheeks and how much his heart was going to hurt when Felix had to take that plane back home, away from him.

…

When the day of Felix’s departure came, it wasn’t hard to notice how sadness took over the usually lively atmosphere when they were together. It wasn’t the end of the world, they knew that Felix could still visit some other time or they could go to Australia too, getting to know Chan and Felix’s hometown. It still wasn’t easy to come to facts with the idea of breaking that routine all four of them had created while Felix had been there. It was weird to think about going back to their usual lives, no Felix to hang out with anymore.

Even though the atmosphere was indeed pretty sad, Felix did his best to keep the smile on his face, making sure to make Changbin laugh from time to time, knowing how the older was, in fact, just as sad as he was.

“Are you dressed enough? It’s still cold back there, I don’t want you to fall sick, getting out of the airport in a t-shirt,” Changbin asked, throwing the hoodie he was holding in his hands at him. While summer was melting them in Korea, winter was not over yet in Australia.

“Hyung, I'm fine really,” Felix said laughing when Changbin started to fix his hoodie as a dad would do before sending their son off. They had arrived at the security checks, meaning that the moment for goodbyes had come. Felix stood in front of Changbin, Chan and Jisung as they watched him with sad eyes.

“I had a great time, guys. Thank you so much for everything you did for me in the past three weeks,” Felix thanked all of them, his smile shining brightly as his eyes turned just that little glossier.

“We had a great time too with you here, Lix. Don’t disappear now that you’re going home, yeah?” Jisung teased, being the first one to get closer to Felix, hugging him tightly.

“Why would I? And I wanna know everything about your mark tomorrow, I can’t wait to see that rose on you, too,” Felix said sincerely, wanting nothing but the best for both Jisung and Hyunjin.

“Of course,” Jisung whispered, his eyes getting wet with tears. 

When he stepped back, Chan spoke.

“Make sure not to burn your kitchen down making pancakes at home, yeah?” Chan teased, his smile nothing but soft for the younger. Felix laughed, whining a bit at the older.

“And you make sure to keep me updated with your music, Chris,” Felix said smiling from ear to ear. Chan felt extremely miserable at the idea of not being able to see that smile for who knows how long.

Felix was the first one to step ahead this time around, throwing his arms around Chan’s shoulders and hugging him tightly. Chan’s mark burned so much he was afraid Felix could feel it too through his shirt. Apparently, he didn’t because a moment later he pulled away, his smile nothing more than a pull at the corner of his lips and his eyes glossy. For the first time, Chan believed that he wasn’t the only one miserable at the thought of parting ways.

Felix then turned to Changbin, the two of them sharing a small smile before silently hugging each other.

“Call me when you land, okay? And I wanna be the first one to know about your soulmate mark, even if it’s in the middle of the night,” Changbin warned, his voice firm but so gentle that Chan had the feeling they were intruding in a private moment.

“Bold of you to assume I would have cared of waking you up anyways,” Felix tried to joke but a small sob made his way through his lips together with his words. Chan noticed how a tear fell on Changbin’s cheek too.

“It was amazing to spend time with you again, Lix, I'm gonna miss you so much,” Changbin said, their hug becoming tighter. Felix whispered something back, probably an “_ I'm gonna miss you, too _” so silent that Chan couldn’t hear it.

Felix’s flight was called and that was the cue for the younger to make his way through the checks. With one last wave and his eyes just as puffy as Changbin’s, he turned his back to the three of them, getting further away, step after step.

In his sadness, Chan noticed how his mark had suddenly lost all its warmth, turning cold again. A coldness he hadn’t felt since Felix had arrived in Korea, bright smile and freckled cheeks for him to fall for.

…

It was five in the morning when Felix was woken up by a weird feeling running through his whole body. He had been back in Australia for two days, having spent the day before face-timing Jisung, who had excitedly showed him the beautiful rose on his hip bone, Hyunjin’s mark finally having a match. Jisung had told him that his mark appeared out of nowhere while he was having lunch with the others, that it hurt a bit but the feeling was exactly the same as having a normal tattoo done.

Felix didn’t dare to move.

At first, still dizzy because of sleep, he started to panic because he couldn't understand what was going on. Then he realised it was indeed his birthday and that was probably his soulmate mark finally appearing on his skin. He didn’t know if freaking out was the right reaction but that was all he could do.

No more than five minutes passed and the feeling went away as if nothing had happened. Felix threw his blankets off of himself and in a matter of seconds, he took off his sweatshirt standing in front of the mirror. He felt his eyes starting to water at the sight in front of him. Right on his collarbone, a series of stars was tattooed, one following the other in a pattern that could be nothing else than a constellation that he didn’t recognise.

Felix caressed the mark, the skin there still feeling a bit numb but Felix guessed that was normal after getting a tattoo done. He had always been fascinated with stars. When he was little, he used to read books about stars being the muses of brave men or guides to those who were lost. He wondered if he and his soulmate were meant to be each other’s guides too. 

Quickly unplugging his phone from the charger, Felix dialled Changbin’s number which he knew by heart. A second later, he decided to opt for a video call instead since he couldn’t wait to show him the mark he now had. He waited for a couple of minutes, feeling slightly guilty for waking up Changbin so early in the morning.

“Felix, it’s too early for this. What do you want?” Changbin mumbled, his eyes still shut as he held his phone at a weird angle above his head. Felix would have felt offended if he didn’t know the older took at least some minutes to understand where he was when he woke up. “Felix, my god, put a shirt on what’s up with—” Changbin complained again once his eyes finally opened before they focused and he suddenly jumped up, now sitting on the bed. “Is that what I think it is?” he asked.

“I just got it now,” Felix said, smiling as brightly as the sun. “I woke up because it was tingling and when I looked in the mirror there it was,” he explained, his hand unconsciously coming to rest on the mark as if he was trying to protect it.

“Did it hurt? How do you feel? Are you happy?” Changbin shot question after question, his voice sounding as excited as Felix’s was. He couldn’t help but laugh at how his best friend shared his feelings even if it wasn’t even about him.

“It hurt a bit but I guess that’s pretty normal,” he started and Changbin hummed, confirming his words. “I'm– I’m really happy. Hyung, I've got a soulmate, can you believe it?” he exclaimed, flopping down on his bed, a dreamy sigh leaving his mouth. By doing so, his hand was now not covering his mark anymore and he watched worriedly as Changbin’s eyes went wide open.

“Lix, Felix, is that– is that a constellation?” Changbin asked, getting closer to the screen as if he could see it better. Felix’s excitement was soon replaced by fear at his best friend’s reaction. He nodded, unable to say anything.

“I can’t believe it,” Changbin exclaimed, his laugh sounding loudly through the phone. Felix felt a bit better knowing Changbin wasn’t worried but rather excited. “This is awesome, oh my god, I can’t believe it,” he kept saying, still not explaining anything to Felix.

“Hyung?” Felix tried to call for his attention, Changbin snapping out of his thoughts as if he had remembered only then that Felix was still there.

“Lix– Lix, I think I've seen that mark before. I might know who your soulmate is,” Changbin announced as if it didn't make Felix jump on his feet, being a mess of confusion, excitement and fear. He stuttered some incoherent sounds, trying to come over the shock.

“W-who? How? Hyung—” Felix stuttered. “Hyung, who are they?” Felix asked, his heart so, so warm at the idea of already having a name to associate with the mark.

“I’m sorry, Lix, I need to make sure I got it right before I tell you anything,” Changbin apologized, calming down a bit, his excitement becoming more serious. “I swear I'm telling you as soon as I've got the confirmation,” he reassured, a small smile making his way on his lips because of something Felix didn’t know yet.

Felix heard another voice mumbling something through the phone and he soon recognised Minho’s voice. He heard the boy ask Changbin what time it was and Changbin quickly explaining that Felix had just got his tattoo and they were now facetiming. Minho’s face suddenly appeared on the screen as well, smiling tiredly at Felix who greeted him.

When Minho’s eyes focused on his mark, his reaction was similar to Changbin's.

“Stars? Isn’t that—” he started but Changbin soon cut him off, not wanting him to say anything before being sure of his words.

“Lix, I'm going to call you back as soon as I can, okay? Oh my god, this is gonna be epic,” Changbin exclaimed and without even waiting for Felix to say something else, he ended the call, the room now silent and dark.

So, not only did Changbin know who his soulmate was but so did Minho. When he realised there was no way he was going back to sleep after that conversation, he got up again, staring at his mark in the mirror. Felix could easily understand that the stars there weren’t just casually placed. It must have been some sort of particular constellation he ignored the name of. He decided to sit down in front of his laptop and try to search for some more information. 

It wasn’t easy to find something on the web since Felix didn’t know how to search for the constellation when he didn’t know anything that could help him out. The mark on his skin was pretty simple but beautiful at the same time. The stars tattooed there weren’t that many but it was easy to see the three bigger ones, being placed one after the other in a vertical line, creating almost a straight segment. The stars around them were just a little smaller but not any less beautiful. When he was just about to give up, not finding anything even remotely similar to his mark, he gave a last try, searching for all the constellations made of three stars in a vertical line.

It wasn’t that much later that he finally found it, the constellation in the picture representing exactly the one Felix had tattooed on his collarbone. Apparently, the constellation was called Pyxis and had been named by a French astronomer in the 18th century. The constellation represented a compass used by navigators and seamen while sailing the oceans. 

Felix’s heart warmed at what that new-found information meant. His soulmate and he were supposed to be each other’s compasses, guiding each other through difficulties until the day they were meant to find their way to one another, someday, somehow. Felix could feel his eyes watering up again at the idea of having something like that in his future.

He was snapped out of the daze he had fallen in when his phone lit up with a message from Changbin.

** _Binnie-hyung_ **

_ can you send me a pic of your mark? _

_ i swear i'm gonna explain it later pls _

Felix frowned a bit through the tears that were still threatening to fall from his eyes but snapped the picture anyway, sending it to his hyung. He couldn’t avoid being a slightly bit hurt that Changbin was hiding something so important from him, but he also understood how Changbin didn’t want to rush things when he still wasn’t sure. For now, he settled with trusting the older, knowing there was no way he would do something to hurt him.

Ever since he was a kid, Felix had always been slightly afraid of the idea of soulmates, knowing what had happened to his mother when she met hers. Felix had wanted to believe that he had someone out there who was looking for him just as much as he was looking for them, but he had never been able to silence that voice telling him he was going to end up as his mother did. 

Now, with his mark freshly tattooed on his own skin and the meaning of that beautiful constellation carved into his heart, he couldn’t stop the relieved tears from falling on his cheeks at the idea of finally having a match somewhere in the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Click [here](https://twitter.com/Felixfrckls/status/1228374089863192585?s=19) for the comic version of the story by @komix.by.3d!  
[This](https://twitter.com/felixfrckls/status/1310260364278464512?s=20) is how the soulmate marks look like!  
I'm always @[felixfrckls](https://twitter.com/Felixfrckls) on twitter and [this](https://curiouscat.me/felixfrckls) is my CC ^.^  
Hope you enjoyed this first chapter uwu I will update the second one as soon as possible!


	2. Second Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “F-Felix? What are you doing here?” Chan asked, his voice sounding husky and wobbly.
> 
> “I-I don’t know,” he confessed before he kept talking as if Chan wasn’t there, “this is so weird. It feels like you’re the real you."
> 
> “What are you talking about? I am the real me,” Chan exclaimed from the bed, looking at Felix as he had just grown a second head, “how did you get here?”

Chan had been awake for no more than half an hour when someone knocked on his door. More than knocked, they basically threatened to break it down from how forceful the action was. Chan quickly jumped on his feet before throwing the door open and expected the worst. It turned out it was just Changbin, who looked half thrilled and half murderous with Jisung patiently waiting behind him. He didn't have time to question them before Changbin made his way inside, Jisung following without a word.

The two of them set at the kitchen table, staring right at Chan, almost as they were expecting him to talk first. Changbin had still that weird expression on, but what scared Chan the most was Jisung’s knowing smirk. He was watching him as if he was a teacher waiting for their student to admit they didn’t do their homework.

“Are you going to tell me why you burst into my house at ten in the morning or what?” Chan asked when he realised they were really going to stay silent if he didn’t speak first. Jisung glanced at Chan, silently telling him he wasn’t going to say a thing until Changbin was done.

“Chan-hyung, what’s your soulmate mark again?” Changbin asked, not because he didn’t know it already but mostly to be completely sure of what was about to come. Chan didn’t say anything at first, wondering why conversations about soulmates seemed so frequent between them lately.

“It’s a constellation. There are three stars in an almost vertical line and other stars splashed around,” Chan described, his head tilted to the side as Changbin’s expression morphed into a delighted one.

Not giving any other explanation or comment on it, Changbin took out his phone and, after a few seconds, he opened a picture. He made his phone slide on the table until Chan could see it from his standing position.

At first, Chan didn’t really understand what was going on and why Changbin had a picture of his mark on his phone. Then, the realisation hit him and he set down, his eyes wide open and his breath coming out in short puffs.

That wasn’t his mark. 

Or better, it was but it wasn’t the one tattooed on his skin. This was his soulmate's own mark, perfectly matching with his.

“W-what is this?” Chan managed to whisper, hoping Changbin and Jisung could still hear him. His eyes had never left the picture in front of him, not even when the screen went black.

“Felix just got his mark this night,” Changbin carefully explained as if he was talking to an animal in a cage. Chan’s head started to spin faster and faster and for a moment his eyes couldn’t focus on anything.

He knew there was a chance of Felix being his soulmate, he had known that ever since the younger boy had stepped foot in Korea, warming up to them in a matter of days. But for all that time, Chan had just tried not to convince himself of something that could have completely ruined him if it didn’t turn out how he had expected it to. 

“I told you so!” Jisung exclaimed, speaking for the first time since they had come into his apartment. Chan was surprised and scared at the same time, not knowing what to think about the whole revelation.

“What? You’ve talked about this before?” Changbin asked, his eyes widening at hearing that for the first time. 

“You mean to tell me you didn’t notice the huge crush hyung has on your best friend?” Jisung asked back, sending Chan a teasing smirk but his voice still soundly curious.

“Of course I did,” Changbin scoffed as if he was offended that Jisung thought so little of him. “But you actually already knew he could have been the one?” Changbin asked, this time directly to Chan whose head had finally calmed down a bit.

“I hoped so,” he confessed, the blush rushing to his ears being a perfect reason for Changbin and Jisung to coo at him. “The skin where my mark is has always been warm when he was near me but ever since he left it’s freezing cold,” Chan explained, knowing they could relate to it. Usually, soulmate marks tended to be warmer whenever you were in near proximity of your other half while they became colder and colder when you moved apart.

“Why didn’t you tell me anything about it? Why didn’t you tell Felix?” Changbin asked a pout on his lips, now knowing that he had been left out of the conversation.

“There was no way I was gonna tell you before I was sure about it. You’re extremely protective of him, if it turned out not to be true you would have ripped my head off,” Chan said, half-jokingly and half-dead-serious. Changbin was indeed protective of Felix, probably because he wasn’t able to be with him all of the time so he always wanted to make sure the younger was doing just great.

“Don’t try denying that,” Jisung said to Changbin, chuckling amused.

“I– Okay, I guess I can’t say anything against that,” Changbin gave up, his hand scratching his neck as he always did when he was embarrassed. Well, at least he was aware of it. “This still doesn’t explain why you haven’t told him,” he pointed out after a while.

“I was just waiting for his mark to appear as well. I have feelings for him but I couldn’t just go there and tell him I am his soulmate out of the blue,” Chan explained, knowing all too well how scary the idea of suddenly meeting your soulmate was. “What if he found me weird or didn't believe me?” he continued, trying to make his point across.

“But what about now? Now that you know he is your soulmate but he doesn't, do you plan on telling him anytime soon?” Jisung asked, making Chan think of something he hadn’t thought about at all. He had his confirmation but now? Felix was now thousands of kilometres away.

“I don’t know,” Chan whispered, leaning his head on the table in front of them. “What if he gets mad because I haven’t told him before?” Chan asked.

“He would never. You had to hear him this morning when I said I think I know who his soulmate is,” Changbin said, fondly smiling at nothing, remembering the excitement Felix had shown.

Chan raised his head so quickly that he nearly gave himself whiplash.

“You did what?!” he exclaimed, his eyes going wide with panic. Changbin realised what he had said.

“Y-yeah,” he said, having at least the decency of looking guilty. “I told him I had seen that mark before but I wanted confirmation before telling him anything,” Changbin explained, trying to make Chan calm down.

“Are you crazy? He’s never going to let you forget you said that until either one of us tell him it’s actually me,” Chan said, standing up and pacing back and forth in front of them.

“Hyung, why are you so scared of telling him? He’s your soulmate and he clearly enjoyed spending time with you when he was here. It’s not like he hates your guts,” Jisung tried to make the older reason, understanding his worry but not really getting why he was panicking in the way he was.

“Yeah, hyung. He was so happy at the idea of finally having his own mark, he kept saying he can’t wait to meet his other half,” Changbin added, as Chan felt himself getting relaxed with each word.

In the mess of the moment, Chan had forgotten the fact that it was Felix they were talking about. The two of them had spent so much time together that he reasoned it was true that there was no way the younger was somehow against having him as his soulmate. Confused and surprised maybe, but not disappointed.

Before Chan or either one of them could say anything, Jisung’s phone started to ring with an upcoming video call. The cute nickname on the screen made Chan understand it was Felix the one calling.

“Should I pick up?” Jisung asked, his gaze switching from Chan to Changbin.

“Don’t tell him we’re here. I think hyung might faint if he sees him right now and if he knows I'm here he will beg me to tell him about his soulmate,” Changbin explained quickly, Jisung already picking up the call before Felix could put it down.

“Lix!” Jisung greeted through the phone as soon as the video call connected and Felix’s face appeared on the screen. “How are you? Changbin-hyung told me you got your mark,” he continued, Chan giving him a death glare from the other side of the table. He was torn between wanting to run away and listen carefully to every single word Felix had to say about the matter.

“I did! Jisungie, it’s so beautiful and I'm so happy. I made some research this morning and I found my mark is supposed to be a constellation standing for a compass,” Felix explained and, even though Chan couldn’t see him, the fondness in his low voice was still clear as the day. 

“Lix, that’s so adorable. I can’t wait for you to find them and match that mark,” Jisung wished, his words honest but still clearly meant not just for Felix but for Chan as well.

Chan had stopped in the middle of the room, staring at nothing while listening to the excited voice of his soulmate wishing to find their match soon– his match who was literally standing on the other side of the phone, hidden away from him.

“I really can’t wait either,” Felix sighed dreamily, his voice taking a warm tint. “Also, did you hear anything from Changbin-hyung? He literally told me he might know who my soulmate is and then he disappeared into thin air,” Felix asked, sounding now whiny. Chan noticed how Changbin was sporting a guilty expression, probably realising it hadn’t been his greatest move to tell Felix that. Because of that, now Chan felt more pressured than he already was and Felix was on edge to know what his best friend was hiding from him. 

“Mhh, nope, he didn’t tell me anything. Maybe he got it wrong or didn’t think I knew the person he’s thinking of,” Jisung tried to reason, shrugging his shoulders, looking rather casual about it. Both Changbin and Chan were really thankful for him at that moment.

“Oh, are you at Chan’s house?” Felix asked suddenly, his name making Chan freeze for a hot second. He thought he could never get over how sweet his own name sounded when coming out of Felix’s lips.

“Yes, but hyung is in the shower right now,” Jisung quickly found an excuse, not that mean to drag Chan into the call when he definitely couldn't handle it. Chan had time to send Jisung a thankful look before Changbin was mouthing a “_ he’s pouting _” directed at him. From the position he was sitting at, Changbin could clearly see the screen of Jisung’s phone –that meant Felix– but the younger couldn't see him at all. Chan felt a blush colour his cheeks.

“Tell Chris I said hi when you see him. I haven’t heard from him in ages,” Felix whined and this time, Chan didn’t need Changbin to tell him Felix was sulking because it was already clear in his voice. He couldn’t help the fond smile making its way on his lips at the sound.

“You literally saw him two days ago when you were still here,” Jisung laughed in disbelief, enjoying how things were turning out. He cared for his friend a lot and he couldn’t help finding it extremely entertaining how Chan’s cheeks were getting redder by the second. Meanwhile, Changbin was quickly moving his eyes from Felix to Chan, his smile full of fondness at the sight of his best friend being so invested in Chan and the latter being just as interested in him.

“That’s still two days too long,” Felix sighed, sounding like one of those overdramatic characters in the movies. While Jisung burst out laughing and Changbin kept silent, shaking his head at his best friend’s silliness, Chan’s heart was threatening to break at how much he longed to be able to be close to the boy again. 

A newfound optimism settled down in his heart at the sound of the freckled boy’s laughter coming from the phone in Jisung’s hands. That optimism didn’t disappear at all in the course of the day and that evening, Chan finally announced to Changbin he was going to confess to Felix the morning after.

...

As tired as he was, when Felix woke up that morning, nothing seemed out of place.

That was just because he was still fighting the heaviness threatening to close his eyes again and it was just a few seconds later that he noticed the first weird thing. He couldn’t feel the soft warmth of his mattress under him, in fact, he couldn’t feel any kind of surface under his body at all. 

After blinking his eyes several times, Felix realised that he couldn’t feel his bed because he was standing in the middle of the room. Not even sitting, he was literally standing frozen on his feet. Questions started to raise in his mind because he was sure he had never sleepwalked until that moment and he could clearly remember to have fallen asleep in his bed, under his warm blankets just the night before.

Looking around his room, trying to make sense of what was going on, he noticed the second element out of place. In fact, that wasn’t his room at all. He knew he recognised the place somehow but he was one hundred per cent sure it was nowhere close to how things were organised in his own bedroom. The curtains trying to stop the warm light to get into the room were purple and the walls were white, while his room had orange curtains and yellow walls. The desk was on the right side of the room while his own desk was on the left and the closet on the right. 

Everything seemed out of place.

The first thing that came to his mind as he glanced at the bed was how it was far too big for a single person. He stopped for a second because he remembered having had the exact same thought the first time he went into another bedroom once, Chan’s bedroom. It was when he glanced at the lump lying under the blankets that, piece after piece, he finally realised where he was. Chan, the boy he hadn’t heard from since he had left Korea, was soundly asleep in his bed, Felix now recognising the room as his from the few times he had been there when he had visited his friend.

He couldn’t help but chuckle at how weird the situation was. He had never really understood dreams and this was the proof of how strange they really were. Felix couldn’t wrap his head around the reason why he was currently dreaming about standing in the middle of Chan’s room, with the boy sleeping just a few meters away from him. It was true that he couldn’t deny how he had been longing to go back in time to the three weeks he had spent with Changbin, Chan and Jisung but that still didn’t explain anything. Why not dreaming of Changbin’s room since they were closer?

Felix had dreamed before, of course, but that one felt unusually odd. It felt too real to be just a dream, the edges of the objects around him too defined, Chan’s body seeming too solid. When Felix dreamed there was always something that made him understand that he wasn’t awake. Like his hair being another colour, his hand having a finger more or less, all things that were quite easy to notice.

But this time, this time, Felix couldn’t find anything wrong in the room or in his own appearance. He felt like it was natural for him to be there as it simply was the place he belonged to and where he had spent countless days. But that, of course, wasn’t true at all, he had been in that room around two or three times tops, usually spending his time with Chan either in the living room of the apartment or outside. And above all, he considered Chan a great friend but he still couldn’t explain why he felt so familiar around him.

Being stared at made Chan stir in his sleep, somehow feeling the gaze on himself. Felix held his breath not knowing what to expect. In his dreams, he didn’t need to think about his actions, in fact, it usually felt like he was just watching a show with himself as a character. This particular time, however, he was more than conscious of his own thoughts, being able to move around and to speak as if it was the reality, as if he really was in Chan’s room as any other normal day he had spent there.

Felix watched with wide eyes as Chan turned around, opening his eyes slightly before closing them again. When Chan had focused on Felix, their glances actually meeting, Felix was surprised at the blunt fondness making its way on Chan’s face and the smile stretching his lips. His surprise soon turned into fear as he watched Chan’s eyes snap open again, staring at him blinking quickly, adjusting to the light.

“F-Felix? What are you doing here?” he asked, his voice sounding husky and wobbly.

Once again, Felix didn’t know how to act because he usually didn’t have to be the one who spoke in his dreams. This instead felt like a real conversation he was in charge to carry.

“I-I don’t know,” he confessed before he kept talking as if Chan wasn’t there, “this is so weird. It feels like you’re the real you."

“What are you talking about? I _ am _ the real me,” Chan exclaimed from the bed, looking at Felix as he had just grown a second head, “how did you get here?”

“This is ridiculous. This is a dream, there’s no other explanation. I fell asleep and I’m dreaming of being here, it makes sense,” Felix kept rambling, not answering any of Chan’s questions.

While Felix had woken up in a situation so odd that there was no way it was real, the bright lights of the morning were what had stirred Chan from his sleep. The older was still in his bed and in his own room so it was clearly more difficult for him to understand that he still wasn’t awake. Still, it was impossible to explain how Felix had got there in the first place if that wasn’t a dream.

“Felix—” Chan started once again, trying to understand what the hell was going on but he was interrupted by a sound ringing in the room like an echo. It was faint at the beginning before getting louder and louder, now distinctive in silence.

“This is the sound of my alarm. Why is it ringing like this?” Chan whispered, glancing around not understanding where the sound came from and how to make it stop.

Meanwhile, Felix’s skin had started to tingle. 

It was a gentle feeling, almost like drops caressing his skin. He couldn’t wrap his head around what was going on until he watched as Chan started to blink repeatedly, yawning before his body dropped on the bed again, unmoving. Felix was about to run to him when he felt a pull on his arm as if someone was dragging him somewhere. Closing his eyes and letting himself be pulled, Felix found himself back in his bed, having woken up the next morning like any other day. 

At the same time, Chan woke up from his sleep the second time that day to the sound of his alarm ringing as any other morning. Turning it off, Chan stared at the same point where Felix had been standing just a few minutes earlier. 

The Felix in his dream had been right. 

Nothing of what had happened was real but, still, something definitely didn’t feel right.

...

Having lost all sort of dignity when it came to Felix, Chan decided to talk to his friends about the weird dream he had the night before. The three of them were eating lunch together before Changbin had to go to the studio, Jisung to his lesson and Chan to the convenience store.

“You really seem out of it today? Did you not sleep tonight?” Changbin asked, watching as Chan seemed more lost in his thoughts than he usually was. That normally happened when he had new lyrics in mind or when he hadn’t managed to fall asleep the night before.

“No, I slept just fine. It’s just that I had a dream and I’m a bit confused,” he confessed, knowing that after the teasing from his friends they would try to help him for real, “I dreamed of Felix."

“Hyung is so cute,” Jisung cooed, making grabby hands at him which he slapped away immediately.

“I woke up, or at least I thought I did, and he was standing in the middle of my room, rambling to himself. I tried to talk to him but then the sound of my alarm started ringing in the dream and I woke up for real,” Chan finished explaining, his voice just as confused as his thoughts.

Ever since he had woken up to the sound of his alarm that morning, he had a feeling that his dream had been something quite different. Mostly because, since he was a kid, he could never remember his dreams waking up in the morning so, the fact that this time he couldn’t forget Felix’s panicked expression didn’t sit right with him.

“What was he saying?” Jisung asked, tilting his head like he always did when he was carefully listening to someone talking.

“He kept saying that it had to be a dream but everything felt too real for it to be one,” Chan answered, remembering how Felix looked completely lost, “and it honestly did. I thought I had woken up for real.”

Chan turned on his left to look at Changbin, taking notice on how the younger had been oddly silent, not joining the conversation at all. He also watched as Changbin was looking at him with furrowed brows. 

“What?” Chan asked.

“I called Felix this morning and he looked as out of it as you are now,” Changbin ventured. “He told me about this weird dream he had tonight. He dreamed of waking up in the middle of your room while you were asleep. He said he knew it was a dream but it felt like he was there for real,” Changbin explained carefully, each word spelt slowly. “He was so shocked that he even forgot to ask me about his soulmate.”

“Wait...” Chan stared at him blinking his eyes. “We had the exact same dream? Just from two different points of view?” he asked, not believing his ears.

“I think you did. I don’t know how it’s possible for it to happen but it’s the only explanation,” Changbin nodded, confirming Chan’s hypothesis.

“And once again, my friends, I’m the one who has to do all the work,” Jisung sighed, shaking his head, not believing his friends were so clueless once again, “you really don’t know anything about soulmates, do you?”.

When Changbin and Chan shook their hands sheepishly, Jisung facepalmed.

“When two soulmates meet each other and are forced apart before both of them find out they are meant to be, they tend to meet in dreams,” he explained as if it was something he was sure everyone knew, “it’s quite rare because usually, soulmates are either friends or strangers to each other before finding out.” 

Apparently, neither Chan nor Changbin knew anything about that because they looked at him with wide eyes as they always did when Jisung shared with them curious facts about soulmates they had never heard.

“So you’re telling me that I’ve actually met Felix yesterday night and it wasn’t just a dream?” Chan asked, his voice shaky. He still had to completely wrap his head around the fact that Felix was his soulmate in the first place, and now this as well.

“Well, _technically_, your souls met while your bodies were still asleep in your own beds,” Jisung specified, nodding his head as he spoke.

“And does this mean I’m going to meet him every night?” Chan asked hopefully, knowing Jisung was the one who had the most knowledge about what was going on.

“Sadly, it doesn’t,” Jisung answered. “Soulmates don’t have rules, it’s all about fate, but there’s usually a pattern. I’m not sure of it but you two will probably meet every two or three days,” he pointed out, explaining all those things his own mother had told him years before.

“I really can’t wrap my head around this. It’s insane,” Chan insisted, rubbing his temples. “I don’t even usually remember my dreams once I wake up but I remember every single second of this,” he complained.

“That’s because that wasn’t a simple dream. That was literally something your soul has lived and so has Felix's,” Changbin pointed out, amazed at how things were turning out for the both of them.

“Hyung, look at the bright side of this, you get to tell him you’re his soulmate in person and actually spend time with him even when you live oceans apart,” Jisung tried to make him reason with it. Chan knew it was something pretty great and he should have been thankful for it but, at the moment, he felt too scared to be happy.

“I’m sorry, guys, I’m just really overwhelmed. I found out just yesterday he was my soulmate and now this. It’s just...a lot” Chan groaned.

“I’m sure it is,” Changbin reassured, patting his back, “don’t let this stress you out but don’t waste your chance either, okay? He’s my best friend and he cares about you a lot. He’s probably freaking out because he has no idea what’s going on, he deserves an explanation.”

Now that Chan thought about it, Changbin was right. While he had both him and Jisung to share his doubts with, Felix had no one. Or at least, he did have Changbin but the older was being a good friend to Chan, not telling Felix anything, even though he knew more than what he had shared with his best friend. It was Chan’s job, after all, to give him answers and the opportunity to deal with this particular situation together.

“Hyung is right, it’s a blessing that you get to meet him and it’s not fair to him to act like you don’t know what’s going on while he’s the only one who really doesn’t,” Jisung added. 

Neither of the two wanted to make him feel like he was being scolded but they couldn’t avoid thinking Felix was being left out of everything. Just as Chan was about to agree with Jisung, his phone vibrated on the table. It was probably one of Felix’s powers to call or send a text whenever they were in the middle of talking about him as if he could sense it.

** _Lixie_ **

_ chris can i video call you later? _

_ i miss your face _

“If he doesn’t stop this I won’t make it until next time we’ll see each other,” Chan whined, his forehead resting on his folded arms. He heard Changbin take his phone and put it back when both he and Jisung had glanced at the text on the screen.

“You know that he’s as whipped for you as you are for him, right?” Changbin pressed, knowing his best friend all too well. Felix’s actions spoke way louder than any other word could and Changbin knew it was just a question of time until Felix realised his own feelings. Changbin couldn’t wait for the day Chan would finally tell Felix about them being soulmates.

Changbin’s laugh rang in the room as he tried to dodge Chan’s offended hand blindly hitting him to make him shut up. Jisung pretended not to notice how Chan’s ears had turned bright pink at the mere thought.

...

“Look who’s still alive,” Felix greeted as soon as Chan picked up the video call.

He was working on lyrics, sitting at his kitchen counter when Felix had called him. He had just got to his apartment and changed into more comfortable clothes before immediately starting to work, his mind filled with different ideas. Even though he usually didn’t like to be interrupted when working, he hadn’t wasted a second to answer Felix’s call, eager to see the younger.

“You’ve literally been gone for four days,” Chan pointed out, “and we texted today.”

“That’s still four days of not seeing your cute face, Chris,” Felix said with his whole heart, looking proud of his words. Chan was about to melt at any second at the puppy look on Felix’s face and the sound of his name on his lips.

“You’re unbelievable,” he murmured hiding his face. “How are things back home?” he asked, trying to divert the attention from the topic. His blush was still a big giveaway of his intentions and Felix chuckled fondly at the sight.

“Everything is alright but it’s so boring here, now. Spending time there with you guys was way more fun than being back here,” Felix confessed. He loved his home and his family but ever since coming back, he couldn’t fight that feeling of something being out of place as if it wasn’t completely right for him to be there.

“You can come to visit whenever you want, you know that, Lix,” Chan reminded him, hoping his eyes conveyed how true his words really were. 

Chan wasn’t the only one who felt that same way. Changbin couldn’t wait to see his best friend again, even though they had just spent three weeks together and Jisung kept asking when it would be possible for Felix to visit Korea for the second time.

“Of course and I wish it was easier to do that. It takes a lot of time and money to fly there,” Felix explained his voice sounding sadder than it did before. It made him feel miserable how difficult it was to get to his friends and to be more connected to a part of his heritage.

Chan didn’t like that troubled expression on Felix’s face so he decided to distract him from those thoughts.

“How about your soulmate mark? Jisung told me you’ve finally got yours,” Chan asked, cursing himself for the choice of topic. He couldn’t deny that deep down the idea of hearing Felix gushing over his soulmate –over him– with his own ears made his heart speed up. He still felt guilty for lying to him but he was working on that.

“Oh, yes! Look, hyung,” he said, moving his sweatshirt away a bit to reveal his collarbone. “Isn’t it beautiful?” he asked, his eyes sparkling.

Chan couldn't suppress his smile. Seeing Felix’s reaction with his own eyes and hearing the clear adoration in his voice made him even more confident about telling him the truth. He had always liked the stars he shared with his soulmate but he had never been too curious about them. Felix, on the other hand, looked like he couldn’t stop talking about it and Chan found that extremely adorable.

“It is,” he simply nodded, a soft smile always on his lips. “Is that a constellation?” he asked, already knowing the answer. He wasn’t going to let the opportunity of seeing Felix being excited over it pass him by.

“Yes! I’ve searched it online and it’s called Pyxis. Apparently, it represents a compass,” Felix explained, his voice full of amazement. “Isn’t it cute, hyung? It’s supposed to be a guide for my soulmate and me,” he continued, sighing softly and leaning his head on his hand. 

That’s when Chan was hit by the fact that Felix wasn’t speaking about an abstract concept that didn't touch him in the slightest. On the contrary, that same mark Felix was so excited about was tattooed exactly on the same place of Chan’s body, too. He had never searched any particular information about it or wondered too much about its meaning, he had always seen it just as a mark, a symbol. As he watched Felix being so passionate about it, he couldn’t help feeling disappointed in himself for having never cared about it as much as he should have had.

“It really is cute, Lix. I’m sure you'll find your soulmate soon, you deserve it,” Chan confessed softly, the fondness in his voice so evident that he couldn’t even try to hide it. 

There still was that fear in him, that voice whispering that Felix didn’t want to have him as his soulmate. Despite that, seeing the blinding smile on the younger’s face and the way his eyes sparkled every time he thought about the one meant for him, Chan couldn’t bring himself to lie any longer. Maybe Felix wouldn’t have accepted him in the way he hoped for, but he deserved to know the truth, now more than ever. And if Felix ever did, in fact, accept him as his missing piece, Chan would have been the luckiest guy on earth to be able to call him his.

“Thank you, Chris,” Felix said softly, his eyes mirroring that softness present in Chan’s own. “Actually, you’ve never told me what your mark is,” he suddenly whined, pouting like a child.

Before finding out Felix was his soulmate, they had talked about his mark just once, Felix not pressuring him into saying anything he wasn’t comfortable with. In fact, Felix knew Chan had received his mark on his 20th birthday but the older had never told him what his tattoo was. Chan had, of course, made sure not to tell anything after finding out Felix's was matching his.

Instead of feeling panic at the sudden question, Chan couldn’t help but smile at the unique situation they were in. He watched as the younger pouted at him through the screen of his phone.

“I’m showing you next time we meet each other,” Chan promised, meaning every single word even though Felix wasn’t able to fully understand them yet. According to Jisung, their shared dreams were going to happen every two or three days and Chan was now more than sure to reveal everything to Felix the next time their souls met during the night.

“But, hyung,” Felix whined, his voice pitched higher, “that’s going to take ages to happen.”

Chan burst out laughing, the circumstances too hilarious to him while the younger faked an offended expression on the other side of the phone. 

“Hey, maybe we’ll see each other earlier than what you think,” Chan teased, not planning to reveal anything to Felix at that moment but still taking advantage of his position to have a bit of fun. Hopefully, Felix could laugh over it too once he knew everything

It was an hour into the conversation when Felix suddenly noticed the time and cursed himself for having lost track of it because he was now going to be late for dance practice. Pouting at the idea of having to hang up, Felix made Chan promise to call him more often, before ending the call with a last blinding smile which Chan couldn’t erase from his eyes even after the screen went blank.

When he looked at the loose sheets where he was writing lyrics before Felix had called him, he watched surprised as the right part of the paper, right next to his messy and confused words, was filled with stars he didn’t even notice he had drawn. Those stars were a perfect copy of the mark Felix had proudly shown him and he was hiding on his own skin. He laughed incredulously at his own behaviour, realising now that he had been doodling the whole duration of the call with the younger.

Staring at the confusion of words and doodles in front of him, he shook his head and, not believing himself, he took another blank sheet of paper. Not even wondering why he was doing it, he started to draw that same constellation again but, this time, he put extreme care in every stroke, the sight of Felix's freckles printed in his mind as he let his hand roam. 

Chan was aware of the fact that if he wanted to be reminded of Felix, he could simply glance at the mark tattooed on his own collarbone but that didn’t stop him from pining the drawing on the wall of his bedroom, smiling softly at it. 

He could understand why Felix loved it so much.

…

Chan was so excited that it took him more than an hour to fall asleep. 

He couldn’t deny that the idea of meeting Felix again scared him a lot because he knew he was going to finally confess. At the same time, he was aware that no matter what the person he was meeting was his soulmate and the thought still made his heart extremely warm. He still didn’t know enough about these dreams to fully understand them, all he knew was that somehow Felix’s soul travelled to his during the night, allowing them to meet.

When Chan woke up, it was to a pull on his ankle. That was all he needed to understand that he didn’t, in fact, properly wake up, he had just got into his dream. Now, all he could do was wait for Felix to arrive. While he was at it, he wondered why it was always Felix travelling to him and never the other way around. He didn’t have much time to think about it before a slight breeze moved the air in the room and out of nowhere, Felix appeared in front of his eyes.

Pretty much as the first time it had happened, Felix was standing in the middle of the room opening his eyes slowly before looking around frantically, trying to make sense of the situation once again.

“I can’t believe I’m dreaming of this again,” Chan could hear Felix murmur, the younger still not realising Chan was awake and staring at him.

“You’re not dreaming,” Chan suddenly said, Felix’s head quickly turning to look at him. Chan had long thought about confessing to Felix but he now realised he had never actually thought of how to do it.

“What the hell is going on? Why does it feel so real?” Felix kept talking to himself, his questions not necessarily directed to Chan. The older could understand his confusion since he had felt the same the first time and was only calmer now because Jisung had explained everything to him.

“Lix, listen to me,” Chan called, making Felix go quiet. There must have been something in his voice because Chan could clearly see Felix relax, even though he still looked sceptical.

“Why do I feel like I’m really talking to you?” Felix asked again, this time his question for Chan only.

“Because you are. Or rather, your soul is talking to mine,” Chan explained, trying not to overwhelm the younger with too much information at once.

“This is insane, what are you talking about?” Felix exclaimed, pacing up and down the room while Chan was still comfortably set on his bed. He knew he shouldn’t have but he couldn’t help finding the situation just that tiny bit funny.

“Lix, you’re going to bore a hole into the floor if you keep doing that,” Chan called softly, still trying to do his best to make the younger calm down, “come sit here for a second, I promise I’m going to explain everything.”

Felix stopped in his track, still looking at Chan as if he was an alien. He must have seen something in his expression once again because with tentative steps he made his way to the bed, sitting at the foot of it, just a bit further than he usually would. Despite everything, Chan couldn’t believe seeing Felix there again.

“Do you remember two days ago when you dreamed of this for the first time?” Chan asked, ignoring the fact that he wasn’t even supposed to know that in the first place.

“How do you know that?” Felix, in fact, asked, his eyes wide open. He had told that to Changbin but never to Chan.

“I know that because I dreamed of that too. Or at least, I thought it was a dream until the next morning I told what happened to Changbin and he told me you had that same dream,” Chan stopped for a moment to let the words settle in, “that’s when Jisung explained to me what’s going on here. That wasn’t a dream, Lix, and neither is this one. This is our souls meeting while our bodies are asleep”.

“It doesn’t make sense. Why would that happen?” Felix asked, his voice not sounding harsh at all, just really confused and still a bit wary.

Chan froze. He knew the moment of the revelation had finally come but he had no idea on how to approach the topic. Was he supposed to just say he was his soulmate? Or show Felix the tattoo straight away? He had just the time to stutter out some incoherent sounds when he noticed Felix’s attention was stuck on the wall over his desk.

“W-what’s this?” he questioned, getting up and making his way straight to the drawing Chan had pinned to the wall just the day before. One would think he had done it on purpose but he honestly didn’t, he had simply forgotten to put that away. Oh well, it could help him with this.

“Hyung, why do you have a drawing of my soulmate mark?” Felix turned to Chan who had got up from the bed as well, following the younger. Felix’s eyes were stuck on the drawing making sure it was indeed his mark.

“Because it’s not only your soulmate mark, Lix,” Chan finally confessed, his voice trembling more than he had hoped for. Even though he knew there was nothing major to worry about, he couldn’t help but feel tense at the younger’s reaction, “it’s mine as well.”

Like a spell, Felix’s attention was completely diverted from the drawing, his eyes staring right into Chan’s. The latter’s heart jumped a bit at the sight of the sparkle in Felix’s eyes. For good measure and because he didn’t know what to say more, Chan moved the material of his shirt away, revealing the dark ink of his mark matching Felix’s.

Chan’s joy soon turned into panic when he noticed Felix’s eyes watering, tears threatening to fall on his pretty cheeks. His fear lessened a bit as a small but fond smile pulled at the corner of Felix’s lips. He was still staring at Chan’s mark almost as if he couldn’t believe his own eyes.

“How long have you known?” Felix whispered, his voice sounding so pure of happiness that Chan didn’t know what to do with himself.

“I had a feeling ever since we made pancakes together,” he confessed chuckling, Felix’s own laugher soon joining, “my mark started to tingle every time I was around you.”

“Why haven’t you told me before? When I was still in Korea, I mean,” Felix asked, his eyes finally leaving Chan’s mark to meet his eyes. For a second, Chan’s words got stuck in his throat.

“I wanted to let you enjoy your time with Changbin,” Chan explained, “and before you got your mark I was afraid you wouldn't believe me.”

Felix opened his mouth to speak again but Chan interrupted, knowing what he was about to ask, “and when I had my confirmation I wanted to take advantage of these weird meetings and tell you in person.”

Felix nodded and, after staring at Chan for a few more seconds, a blinding smile made his way on his lips. That same smile Chan was so weak for and had thought he wasn’t going to see face to face for a very long time.

“You let me gush over my soulmate when you knew I was talking about you,” Felix laughed, not feeling it on himself to be embarrassed about it. “And this is what you meant when you said you were going to show me your mark the next time we see each other,” he went on, realising now all those things Chan had hinted at but he had never understood. Felix’s smile never left his lips and his eyes were sparkling just like the stars tattooed on their skin.

“I’m glad you’re taking it like this and not yelling at me because I haven’t told you sooner,” Chan said, clearly joking but his voice still let Felix understand how much the older must have been nervous to tell him the truth.

“I’m not planning to waste the time I have with you yelling, Chris,” Felix teased, his voice back at that flirtatious tone he used from time to time and always turned Chan into a blushing mess.

Chan didn’t even have time to try to hide his blush or to come up with a decent answer because, in a blink of an eye, his arms were full of an excited Felix clinging to his body. No matter how surprised he was, he was still quick to wrap his arms around the younger’s shoulders, taking advantage of being the same height to hide his head in his neck, just over the mark they shared. 

“I’m really happy right now,” Felix mumbled, his arms tightly hugging Chan’s waist. Even if he couldn’t see him, the older could clearly say he was smiling just by the tone of his voice.

“I am too, Lix,” Chan confessed, not wanting to step back from that embrace anytime soon. His smile grew only bigger when he felt his mark starting to tingle again just as it used to do when Felix was still in Korea with them.

The difference this time was that Felix’s mark started to do the same too. “Is that what happened when I was around you during these past three weeks, hyung?” he asked still not moving away from the hug. The older just hummed, feeling too comfortable in the warm embrace to pull away.

After what felt like too little on Chan’s part, Felix pulled away, his smile just as blinding as it was before. His mark was warmer again and Felix’s freckles were covered by an adorable blush that made Chan’s heart skip a beat.

“What about you telling me more about this whole souls-meeting-each-other thing?” Felix suggested, his curiosity prevailing now that his heart was content where it was.

Leading them to the bed, Chan started to explain everything from the beginning. From how his mark got cold when Felix flew back home, to how Jisung knew a lot more about soulmates than he did and had explained to him all he knew. Chan made also sure to tell Felix he was the one who had asked Changbin to keep quiet about it even if the younger knew the truth.

Felix listened to every word that left his mouth, amazed at what was happening but above all so, so thankful. After what felt like ages and no time at all, the sound of Chan’s alarm started to ring in the room and both of them now knew what to expect.

As Felix felt that familiar pull to his arm and his skin started to tingle and Chan felt his eyes dropping closed, they promised to see each other soon, this time both of them fully understanding those words.

Even after waking up, the skin where their mark was tattooed felt warmer, as if it wasn’t able to forget the events of the night.

…

“Why do you look much happier than you usually are?” Changbin asked, clearly noticing the excitement showing all over Felix’s face. 

“I’ve talked to Chan-hyung tonight,” Felix explained, not adding any more details, aware that Changbin knew everything already.

Waking up that morning had been both a blessing and a curse. The idea of leaving the dream was something he didn’t like at all but, at the same time, he couldn’t wait to tell everything to his best friend, even though there wasn’t much to say that he wasn’t already aware of.

“He finally got the courage to tell you,” Changbin thought out loud, sounding both proud of Chan and incredibly happy for Felix. “What do you think about it?”

“I’m so happy, hyung. I feel like he’s the best soulmate I could have ever hoped for,” Felix confessed, his cheeks turning a bit darker while his voice tinted with the softest of tones.

“It almost sounds like you like him,” Changbin teased, even though his eyes never left Felix’s face on the screen. When all Felix did was blush a bright red and cast his eyes down, Changbin had his confirmation. “You do? How come I'm just hearing of this now?” he asked. He had already guessed there was something more between them but hearing about it so suddenly still came as a surprise since Felix usually told him everything. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Felix quickly apologized seeing the slightly hurt expression on Changbin's face. His friend was good at hiding his emotions but he was like an open book to him by now. “I just thought you would find it annoying, me crushing on your friend as soon as I stepped in Korea, I mean. Besides, I thought it was just a fleeting crush on a cool guy who would never feel the same anyway,” he explained, his ears burning pink even through the camera of the phone.

The fact that he had always found Chan attractive and really charming didn’t come as a surprise to him. He tended to have small crushes on people who caught his attention but they usually didn’t last more than a couple of days, it was infatuation more than anything. So, when he had started wanting to spend time with Chan and be in his company all the time, he had simply thought that it was the case again. When those feelings didn’t falter even after coming back home, he started to realise that maybe it wasn’t just a small, fleeting infatuation.

“Lix, the guy has been crushing on you since basically the first moment you talked to him,” Changbin said incredulously, not believing Felix had really never noticed Chan’s obvious crush on him and still doubted it now.

“H-He has?” Felix stuttered obliviously, his blush coming back in full force.

Changbin facepalmed. “I really need to stop saying things I'm not supposed to,” he shook his head, “I thought he told you that as well in your dream.”

Felix had guessed that if Chan was so eager to tell him about them being soulmates, he couldn't be totally indifferent to him. Despite that, no official confession had been made by neither of them. Felix reasoned they had all the time in the world to speak about their feelings. After all, they were soulmates meant to be together forever.

“We haven’t got there yet,” Felix explained, “he just explained what Jisungie told him about the dreams and how he understood we were soulmates.”

“What do you plan to do now? About the dreams and everything, I mean,” Changbin asked, his voice taking a more serious note.

“It’s not like there’s much I can do, hyung. It’s already amazing I get to spend time with him even if we’re oceans apart,” Felix confessed.

After all, it was true. Finding his soulmate was a blessing and having the chance to spend time with them, even if there was no logical explanation behind it, was even better. Hanging out with Chan when their souls met and their bodies were asleep was the best and only thing he could keep doing right now.

“You can always come here again,” Changbin suggested a hopeful tilt of his voice clear as the day.

“We have already talked about this, hyung. I’d love to but I have school and travelling to Korea so soon again is really expensive. I can’t just take a plane and fly there in a blink of an eye,” Felix tried to joke, chuckling lightly even if there was no amusement behind it.

Ever since leaving Korea, he had found himself constantly thinking about travelling there. It was true that his friends, and now his soulmate too, were there but he really couldn’t explain the sudden longing to be there. He loved his mother, his sisters and all the friends he had in Australia but that still didn’t stop him from realising that he would fly to the other country in a heartbeat if he could. Sadly, he didn’t have the time nor the money to do that just now.

“It was so weird to have you here for so long and now everything is back to normal. We all miss you, Hyunjin and Minho-hyung have been dying to show you a dance they choreographed and Jisung is already planning the next tour of the city for you,” Changbin said, his voice soft and just a bit sad.

They were good with long-distance, they had got used to it when Felix left all those years ago. Now that they had had the time to be together for so long and Felix had made so many friends there too, it felt like they were back to square one. 

“These are the last few months of the semester here, so it means I’ll have a lot more free time once it’s over. I’ll make sure to plan everything out and come visit again then,” Felix decided, already organising everything in his head. “I miss you guys like crazy,” he confessed.

“We miss you a lot too, Lix,” Changbin simply answered, no more words needed, “at least you get to meet Chan.”

“I do and I’m so thankful for that,” Felix confirmed, “but it’s still not like being there with all of you.”

Felix loved Australia with his whole heart.

It was and always will be his home country, but, for the first time, he found himself thinking about how much he longed to leave everything he had there. It was crazy and it was hardly possible but he still couldn’t stop his brain from picturing a future in a country so foreign, but that felt more like home than any other place had ever done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Click [here](https://twitter.com/Felixfrckls/status/1228374089863192585?s=19) for the comic version of the story by @komix.by.3d!  
[this](https://twitter.com/felixfrckls/status/1310260364278464512?s=20) is how the soulmate marks look like!  
I'm always @[felixfrckls](https://twitter.com/Felixfrckls) on twitter and [this](https://curiouscat.me/felixfrckls) is my CC ^.^  
I'm planning to update the third chapter on Sunday!  
Hope you enjoyed this one uwu <3


	3. Third Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chan didn’t stop him when the younger threw the door of his bedroom open, running in the other room to put distance between them. As the younger moved while Chan was frozen on his bed, he could hear the words Felix was muttering to himself.
> 
> _Felix, wake up. Please, wake up._

The first thing Chan had noticed when Felix materialised in his room that night were the dried tears on his cheeks and his puffy eyes, even puffier than they were when he was usually woken up from his deep sleep.

“Hey,” Chan quickly got up from his bed, making his way to Felix. “What’s going on?” he asked, his hand coming to rest on the side of Felix’s neck. 

Felix looked miserable and like he had cried for hours before his soul woke up together with Chan’s. With worry written all over his face, Chan realised that Felix had probably even fallen asleep crying considering the state he was in. 

“Chris,” Felix said as if he had just snapped out of a trance. He hid his face in his hands, quickly drying his eyes to prevent the older from seeing how swollen they were. “It’s nothing, I’m okay,” he lied through his teeth.

Chan stayed quiet, simply looking at him while his fingers were caressing the skin of his neck. Felix sighed, giving in, “Just a bad day, I guess.”

Standing in front of Chan, Felix looked like a kicked puppy. His head was cast down while his voice sounded the weakest Chan had ever heard it, his eyes were still bloodshot and puffy. All Chan wanted to do was hug him tightly and tell him everything was going to be alright, no matter how bad things looked.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Chan asked softly, not wanting to sound nosy or make Felix think he was pushing him in any way. If Felix wanted to talk then he was more than willing to listen, otherwise, he was fine with just being there for him.

“Can you...” Felix started sounding unsure. “Can you just hold me for a little while?” he asked shyly as if there was any possibility of Chan refusing that.

Despite still being concerned for Felix, Chan could still feel his heart skipping a beat at the idea of getting to hold him close. He didn’t trust his voice to speak, so he gently took Felix’s hand in his and with a reassuring smile, he pulled the younger towards the bed where both of them set.

Chan moved so his back could lean on the headboard of the bed and Felix quickly lied down next to him, with his head pillowed on Chan’s chest. Chan didn’t hesitate a second to wrap an arm around Felix’s shoulders to bring him closer, the boy contently hiding his face in Chan’s neck, just over the soulmate mark. 

Chan hoped Felix couldn’t hear his heart going crazy in his chest.

On reflex, Chan started to card his fingers through Felix’s hair, gently caressing his scalp and Felix melted in the embrace, his muscles relaxing completely against Chan’s body. It was after a couple of minutes of blissful silence that Felix finally talked.

“My mum was really down today and I just hate seeing her like that,” Felix finally confessed. His voice was as weak as it was before, maybe even more, and Chan couldn’t help wrapping his arms more tightly around the small body. His heart broke at the sadness in Felix’s voice.

“I feel like I should do something for her but I don’t know what to do. My sisters love her too but they’re always so busy and I don’t think they always notice,” Felix let everything out, finally letting his worries run free. 

As much as Chan wanted to comfort Felix, he felt like the boy didn’t need any fake reassuring, all he needed was someone there for him, someone who could offer a shoulder to cry on. He opted for leaving small kisses on the top of Felix’s head, still massaging his scalp while their fingers played on his stomach.

“And I’ve got my own worries too but when she feels so down, I feel selfish to even mention them in a conversation,” Felix finished, his voice now nothing more than a whisper as Chan listened carefully to every word he was saying. Despite the worry and the sadness of seeing Felix’s smile replaced by tears, Chan’s heart warmed up just that tiny bit at the realisation that Felix trusted him enough to share with him with his concerns.

“Maybe your dad can do something for her,” Chan suggested cluelessly. He understood that it was probably not the best thing to suggest when Felix snuggled closer in his embrace, his arms tightening around him.

“My father isn’t really in the picture,” he confessed and Chan was surprised at the coldness dripping from in his voice. He would expect Felix to be unhappy about it but instead, he talked about his father as if he was glad that things were the way they were. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know that,” Chan apologized, hoping he hadn’t overstepped any boundaries or made the younger uncomfortable with his words and the sudden topic.

“Don’t apologize. It was for the best,” Felix reassured and even if his voice was still slightly tinted with coldness, he nuzzled his nose on Chan's neck to make sure he knew he wasn’t mad or uncomfortable.

“I can imagine what goes on in my mum’s mind when she feels so down. And I want to tell her about us, about how happy you make me, but I’m so scared that it’s just going to remind her what her own soulmate did to her,” Felix continued where he left off, his tone both desperate and angry at something Chan couldn’t quite understand yet.

Chan stayed quiet, still holding Felix close. “What happened with your father?” he then blurted out, not expecting the words to actually leave his mouth. When he realised what he had just asked, he was quick to apologize. “I’m sorry, you don’t have to tell me. I shouldn’t have even asked, I’m sorry.”

Felix didn’t say a word but he didn’t pull back either. 

From the way Felix was staring at their intertwined fingers, playing with them, Chan could understand that he was deep in thoughts. Felix apparently made up his mind and sighed before closing his eyes. “It’s okay, I trust you,” he whispered before starting to talk a bit louder.

“When my mum got her soulmate mark, it hurt her for days to the point that she couldn’t even walk. It turned out it was a sign to warn her about how toxic her soulmate was going to be in her life,” he started. “They met, got married and had me and my sisters. They were happy until my father started to drink. He would come home drunk more often than not and yell at her for the smallest of things,” Felix shivered at the memory. “Things got worse when she forced him to stop drinking and he started to get violent. My sisters and I were still young but, when we started to get in the way to defend our mom, he didn’t have second thoughts on beating us up too, all three of us.” 

Chan could feel his shirt getting wet with Felix’s tears as memories started to flash in front of his closed eyelids like a bad horror movie. Chan’s eyes got wet too when he noticed how Felix’s body was shaking in his arms. His happiness, the boy who had always reminded him of the sun had to go through all of that and still manage to live his life with a smile on his lips. At the realisation, Chan fell even deeper for the strong, strong boy he was holding.

“What happened then?” Chan whispered, feeling like, as much as it pained Felix, letting everything out was what he needed at that moment.

“My mom managed to get a divorce and our custody. It was one of the reasons why we moved here when I was in high school, we all needed to get away from there,” Felix confessed but there was clearly something more. “One day, my mom got a call and they told her that my father had committed suicide. He left a letter behind where he said how he had wished to be a better man for her, for us. My mom’s mark started to fade then and now it’s difficult to even see the outline of it,” Felix was openly crying now, the sobs ringing loudly in the silence of the night.

“Oh, love,” Chan choked on his own tears, tightening his hold on Felix’s shaking body until there wasn’t a part of their skin that wasn’t in contact. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” he kept repeating. He didn’t know what he was apologizing for but what he knew was that Felix didn’t deserve any of that pain.

“I hate him for what he did to us, for how much he hurt my mom. For being a coward and running away instead of facing her,” Felix sobbed, his words tinted with hatred and desperation, “but he was still my dad.”

Chan left Felix cry on his shoulder, his own tears falling down on his cheeks as he felt the sadness radiate out of Felix, his happy sun. After what felt like hours, Felix’s body stopped shaking so violently and his sobs turned into sniffles. Only then Chan dared to speak again.

“You didn’t deserve any of that. Your mum and your sisters didn’t either,” Chan felt the need to say, his voice full of soft determination.

Felix nodded against his neck, “it took a while but over the years, I’ve started to understand that.” Felix lifted his head from where it was hiding in Chan's neck to gently rest it against his shoulder, his puffy eyes coming to meet Chan’s red ones. The younger frowned at the sight of the tears on Chan's cheeks and moved his hand to dry them.

“That’s good,” Chan whispered, staring into Felix’s eyes as his breath got stuck in his throat.

“My mum was worried that getting my mark would have hurt me that much too,” Felix continued, his voice more steady as his tears had finally stopped. “I was honestly scared too and I’m so glad it didn’t. I know she would be genuinely happy if I told her about you but I don’t know if she’s ready to hear about it yet,” the younger confessed as the conversation finally came to an end.

“I won’t say that everything will be alright because I can’t promise you that,” Chan began as Felix’s fingers started to caress his brows. “What I can promise you instead is that whenever you feel ready to tell her, I’ll be by your side. In fact, as a friend, a lover or whatever you want me to be, I would love to always stay by your side,” Chan confessed, his words both reassuring and lighting up a new sparkle in both of their chests.

“And if you’ll let me, I’d love to do just the same for you,” Felix whispered back, all his defences breaking down as his heart warmed in that familiar way that only Chan could make him feel. The older broke in a wide smile at his words, making Felix’s lips spontaneously turn upwards as well.

As both of them fully realised the implication behind those words, nothing felt more right than leaning towards each other until the deal those words carried was sealed with a kiss. The warmth in their chests quickly matched the tingly feeling of their mark, the sensation so heartwarming that both of them giggled against the other’s lips.

“Thank you,” Felix whispered against his lips, “for listening to me and trying to understand, for being someone I would gladly spend my whole life with.”

Chan leaned in for another kiss, “thank  _ you _ for trusting me and for giving me the chance to be in your life.”

There was no need to say anything else as their lips met over and over again and their tears slowly dried on their cheeks. The faint sound of Chan's alarm rang in the room like a distant echo when they parted ways.

They woke up in their respective beds with the feeling of a lingering last kiss still on their lips.

…

As their relationship started to get more serious and the prospect of the future constantly lingered in their minds, Chan felt the need to get closer to Felix, not just emotionally but physically too. The fact that their souls had the opportunity to meet so often even with an ocean between their bodies was a blessing but it still didn’t allow them to forget that it wasn’t completely real. 

Something in those dreams always felt faint as if their emotions were half as strong as they would have been in real life. It was an awareness that was always at the back of their minds and even in their happiest moments, it was hard to forget that the situation wasn’t easy. Even after years of waiting for his soulmate, Chan still couldn’t live a relationship with them in the same way any of his friends did.

Apparently, Felix felt the same and Chan smiled to himself at the memory of the conversation they had weeks before.

_ Video calls were something constant during their days together since it was the only way for them to feel like they were actually talking face to face. If before their phone and video calls were filled with curious questions and endless talking, over the months they had got to know each other through the dreams, the calls had become nothing more than a way to feel the other close. _

_ More often than not, they did their own stuff silently, casting glances to the screen from time to time, just to smile fondly at the sight of the other boy’s focused expression through it. It almost felt like being in the same room and they soon understood that sometimes no words were needed to let the other know that, despite everything, they were there.  _

_ Chan was sitting on the floor in front of his coffee table with his laptop opened on it while he quickly wrote things on a loose piece of paper. The moving screen staring at him showed Felix just as busy with writing an essay due in two days from then. Both rooms were quiet, neither of the two wanting to bother the other with music or unnecessary conversations. _

_ Another half an hour passed in that way until Felix finally finished what he had been working on and focus his attention on the boy on the other side of the screen. He felt his lips turn into a smile at the sight of Chan poking his tongue out of the corner of his mouth, probably too concentrated on his work to even notice.  _

_ For a second, Felix debated staying silent, not wanting to make Chan lose his train of thoughts but this couldn’t wait. _

_ “Hyung?” Felix called gently, not to startle the boy with the sudden ring of a voice in the otherwise silent room. “Can I talk to you for a second? I don’t want to bother if you’re busy though,” Felix asked shyly, knowing how annoyed Chan got every time someone interrupted him while he was working.  _

_ Chan was indeed busy but he also was starting to get frustrated with how things weren’t working out the way he wanted them to, so he figured that a short break could perhaps help. Besides, there was nothing that could actually make Chan turn down a chance to talk to Felix, not when this was all they could do during the day. _

_ “Sure, I’m stuck anyways,” Chan agreed easily, smiling fondly at the boy on his screen. _

_ Even in the pixelated image the poor connection created, Chan could see how Felix was bouncing in his seat, both excitement and nervousness written all over his face. Chan wondered what could make him feel such contrasting emotions all at once. _

_ “You look like you’ve just drunk a dozen coffees,” Chan pointed out as Felix stayed silent, even though he now had all his attention. “But I know you don't like coffee, so what’s up?” he asked, fondness mixing with concern in his voice. _

_ “I'm just really happy. And a bit nervous,” Felix admitted, blushing bright red at something Chan still didn’t know. He had only seen him like this when he had finally found the courage to ask Chan about what they were, the next time their souls met after their first kiss together.  _

_ Chan didn’t say more, just moved the laptop closer so it could clearly focus on his face and he tilted his head to the side to let Felix know he was ready to listen.  _

_ “You know I just started my second year in uni here, right?” Felix began, talking extremely slowly as if he was focusing to catch every single of Chan's reactions. As the older nodded, he kept talking. “There's a path my college offers where students can attend the first two years here and the last two in a foreign country,” Felix explained and Chan started to understand where the conversation was going.  _

_ “In any foreign country? Korea too?” he asked, hopefully. He could guess the answer for that from the way Felix nodded to himself.  _

_ “Korea too,” he confirmed. “I asked how that worked and they told me that no country is excluded, as long as I attend a university that offers the same major I’m taking here,” Felix explained, sure of the information. _

_ Chan's heart sped up at the words. Not only had Felix considered the idea but had even made sure that everything could work before breaking out the news to Chan. _

_ “Is it something that you can actually do? Is it open to everyone?” Chan shot question after question, his excitement growing at what Felix’s words could imply.  _

_ “My grades here are already excellent and the fact that I attended high school there already is a huge bonus. I still need to figure some things out but it is a possibility,” Felix softly announced, not really knowing how Chan could take it. He wasn’t dumb and he knew Chan wanted to be with him just as much as he did but the news was still a lot to take in and he hoped he hadn’t overwhelmed him. _

_ “If this happens,” Chan started gulping heavily, “how long will it take?” _

_ All Felix could see in Chan's eyes was hope, the same hope swimming in his chest too. _

_ “If everything goes as planned it should take up to twelve months. If they manage to fasten the process, probably less,” Felix informed, the words sounding so foreign on his lips.  _

_ The mere idea of actually being able to do that was something he hadn’t fully realised yet. Felix saw the realisation down on Chan as the older broke into a smile so huge that Felix was afraid it could have torn his face in a half. Just as that smile came and the words settled, it disappeared, leaving the place for a frown. _

_ “Don’t get me wrong, having you here would make me very happy,” Chan started, “but you moved all the way back home just to attend the university you’re in now. You’re sure you won't regret it?” _

_ Chan felt a rush of adrenaline running through his body at the idea of having Felix there with him for more than a few days, finally living the life with his soulmate both of them had always dreamed of. At the same time, he still couldn’t shake off the realisation that Felix was about to give up on his dream just to be closer to him. If anything happened, Felix would have ruined his life just because of him. _

_ “I moved here before I knew you were there,” Felix reminded him, flushing bright red when he grasped the words he had just said out loud. It wasn’t that he didn’t mean them but it was still a thought he hadn’t planned to voice. “I'm sorry, that was cheesy,” he apologized, breaking eye contact with the screen to play with something laying on his desk. _

_ Chan thought about those words, about how obvious it was that Felix really meant them. This boy was ready to change the plans he had worked so hard for just to live his life by his side just as they had promised each other.  _

_ “It’s fine,” Chan choked, a lump of emotions stuck in his throat, making it hard to talk. “Believe me, it’s even more than fine,” his voice cracked. _

_ Somehow it felt like the confession they had both been waiting for. _

  
  


As the weeks went on and the topic wasn’t touched again, Chan started to feel a bit anxious.

On his part, he didn’t want to make Felix feel pressured. Deep inside, he knew that it wasn’t an easy process so it was only understandable that Felix needed to work around some things before confirming anything.

When a whole month from that conversation passed by and still nothing had been said, Chan started not only to feel anxious but hurt as well. He was in this as much as Felix was so it was only right to keep him updated, right? It was impossible that in so long, Felix didn’t get any more information about the study path he wanted to take.

Chan decided to address the topic himself the next time their souls met, preferring to wait then than to do it through a call or a text. At least that was the closest thing he could do to discuss it face to face.

As Felix materialised in his dreams that night, he didn’t wait too long to bring up the subject, knowing that he would have talked himself out of it if he had waited any longer, scared to overwhelm his boyfriend.

“Can I ask you something?” Chan started, opting not to ask Felix what was in his mind straight away but giving him some sort of warning first.

Felix, who was going through Chan's collection of CDs, made an affirmative sound before turning to look at the older sitting on the bed. When he noticed the serious expression on Chan’s face, he turned around, now fully concentrating on him.

Once Felix was standing in front of him, Chan talked again. “It’s been a month since you told me you’re thinking about attending college here, then you’ve never told me anything more about it.” 

It was an observation more than anything but Felix could clearly hear the implied question.

_ Have you changed your mind? _

At the way Felix tensed up, Chan understood there was no good answer to that and for a single moment, he regretted asking anything in the first place.

“I wanted to talk to you about this but I didn’t know how to,” Felix began, not moving any closer to Chan who still staring up at him from his bed. “I told my mother about it. She doesn’t really like the idea,” he confessed, rubbing the back of his neck.

In him, Chan could see multiple emotions, from sadness to discouragement, to disappointment. What made Chan reconsider his previous thoughts was the blunt surrender written all over Felix’s face as if he had long come to terms with the idea of giving up.

After spending every day for a month hoping for good news, silencing his doubts with the reminders that Felix cared and there was a reason why he didn’t bring up the topic, now Chan could only feel anger. Maybe it was unfounded but he still couldn’t calm down his emotions and rationally think about the situation.

“So, you’re saying you’re giving up just because your mother doesn’t like the idea?” Chan asked rhetorically, his voice as cold as Felix had never heard it. Not directed at him, at least.

The sound of it made Felix tense up too, those defence walls coming up in full force.

“What I’m  _ saying _ ,” Felix started, putting emphasis on the words, “is that she needs some time to grasp what is going on. I can’t just move to the other side of the world and leave her behind.” 

Felix was starting to get annoyed as well, Chan could understand it by the way his voice was getting lower and his words slower, as if he wanted to make sure Chan was listening to each and every single one of them.

“You’re not leaving her behind, she can't stop you from wanting to be with your soulmate!” Chan exclaimed, a wave of unfair anger directed at Felix’s mother growing in his chest. After all that Felix had told him about the woman, Chan should have understood where her scepticism came from. But in that moment, the only thing he could associate with her was the realisation that Felix wasn’t going to move closer to him as he had been hoping for so long.

“She’s just scared of things not working out just as they didn’t between her and my father,” Felix countered, his voice rising slowly until Chan could see the flames swirling in his eyes.

“I’m not going to be like your father!” Chan yelled, feeling the need to point that out as he could feel Felix drifting away from him second after second.

“I know that but she doesn’t! For fuck’s sake, she hasn’t even met you and I'm telling her I'm going to move away to be with you,” Felix defended, trying to make Chan understand how surreal the whole situation they were in was. 

The idea of moving to Korea was something Felix had constantly thought about ever since he had moved back home after visiting during winter break. It was something he had grown familiar with but it was only reasonable that his mother was scared to lose him, learning about his plans so suddenly.

“If that’s what you really want, she can’t stop you,” Chan said, his voice becoming quieter as the implication rang in the air. “That is if you’re not the one who changed their mind,” he pushed, knowing fully well how those words were only meant to drive the younger on edge more than he already was.

The blind anger was clouding his better judgment and by now, the only thing he wanted was finding someone to blame, because deep down he knew he couldn’t blame Felix’s mother for being scared or Felix himself for not wanting to upset the woman. But it was easier to be angry at Felix and his mother instead of coming to terms with the fact that their plans had changed and, at least for now, Felix wasn’t coming.

“I’m just asking for some more time to figure things out and get her to realise that not all soulmates are not meant to be,” Felix let out  exasperated , at this point only wanting to put a stop to the conversation and dealing with it again when both of them had calmed down.

As much as he wanted to be with Chan, he had made a vow to always take care of his mother in her darkest days and if she needed time to get comfortable with the idea of Felix leaving then he wouldn’t push it.

“I've spent three years waiting for you, three years of watching people around me finding their halves while I had no one by my side. You’re lucky because you didn’t have to spend years feeling like you were meant to be alone, even with the mark. I don’t think you can understand how unfair it is for you to ask me to wait,” Chan said slowly, his anger turning into apathy and that was almost more dangerous.

It was an emotion that held an explosion behind and Felix wasn’t sure they were both going to get out of it alive.

“Chris, you can’t ask me to choose between you and my mother. Not after everything that has happened in the past,” Felix whispered, eyes turning glossy and those walls around him breaking down brick by brick.

Felix didn’t say it but Chan immediately understood what those words meant, the implication behind that pained whisper. 

_ You’re my soulmate but she is my mother. You can’t ask me to choose between you two because I wouldn’t choose you. _

And with that Chan felt the last crumb of hope being crushed down by the realisation that as long as Felix’s mother didn’t come to terms with her son believing in the future he and Chan could have together, that future didn’t exist.

Anger, disappointment and heartbreak all turned into one lethal goal, distancing Felix as much as he could before his own walls broke down and the regret started to take over everything else.

“Maybe she’s right,” Chan calmly started, “maybe not all soulmates are meant to be.” His words were pure venom, the outloud confirmation of things between them coming to an end before they could even properly start.

Chan saw Felix take a step back as if he had been physically pushed away from him. His cheeks were wet with tears that were still escaping his eyes, eyes that were filled with betrayal and disgust for the words he had had just heard.

“How can you say that when you know what happened with my father?” Felix whispered, hurt beyond belief. “What happened to always staying by my side?” he asked mockingly, not believing Chan had made all those fake promises when he couldn’t even take the time to understand him.

Chan stayed silent, staring right at Felix from his bed. He was so overwhelmed that he couldn’t feel anything and Felix’s words washed over him until his skin was soaked and the hurt in Felix’s voice pierced under his skin, finding its way to his heart.

“I don’t want to see you ever again,” Felix whispered as the tears didn’t stop and his eyes were now red and puffy. 

Chan didn’t stop him when the younger threw the door of his bedroom open, running in the other room to put distance between them. As the younger moved while Chan was frozen on his bed, he could hear the words Felix was muttering to himself.

_ Felix, wake up. Please, wake up. _

After what could have been either minutes or hours, Chan got up and made his way to the room Felix was in, maybe to talk, maybe only to find amusement in the fact that not much distance could be put between them when their souls were trapped together during the night.

Or so he thought because Felix was nowhere to be seen and his whispers now started to make sense to Chan.

Felix had forced his body to wake up, leaving Chan's soul alone in a world meant for two.

…

It took Chan around two days to understand how much he had fucked up and one week of unanswered texts and calls going straight to voicemail to understand that Felix wasn’t joking when he said he didn’t want to have anything to do with him anymore.

Every single word he had told him that day was purely driven by anger and sadness and only now he had fully realised how he had used Felix’s weakness against him, mentioning his father just to be the winner of that useless argument that had just led him to lose Felix.

As much as he was scared that Felix was really going to drop off the face of the Earth and never acknowledge him again, he still constantly reminded himself that their souls were still going to meet each other at night and there was nothing Felix could do to avoid that. It was true that it had been over ten days since their argument and there hadn’t been any shared dreams meanwhile but, as Jisung had told him all those months ago, soulmates didn’t have rules and no one could control how often those dreams happened.

He was sure of it until three weeks went by and, every night, he fell asleep ready to face Felix, just to wake up the next morning, feeling a weight growing heavier on his chest. The heartbreak was so painful that he couldn’t bring himself to leave his bed, the days moulding together as he couldn’t even understand when it was morning and when it was nighttime.

His friends were worried for him but he brushed them off, never mentioning anything about the argument he had with Felix and how he had the feeling this was really going to be the end of them. Felix kept ignoring him and their souls stopped meeting during the night, making it impossible for Chan to have any kind of hope for their future together.

The chance of making things better came in the form of Changbin bursting through his door in the middle of the day –or was it night?– shooting daggers at Chan through his eyes.

“What the fuck happened between you and Felix?” the younger asked straight away, finding it difficult to be gentle with the person who had hurt his best friend.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Chan said, rolling on his other side. He had tried to sound nonchalant as if he really didn’t know anything but his voice had cracked at the mention of his soulmate’s name. God, he missed him so much.

“Do you want me to start by asking why you’ve been locked in here for the past three weeks?” Changbin asked, “or would you like to explain to me why the fuck Felix is asking me to warn him when you take a nap during the day so he can make sure not to fall asleep too?”

That came as a shock to Chan who finally realised why he hadn’t been able to meet Felix in his dreams anymore. Somehow, Felix had avoided going to sleep when Chan did, probably sleeping during the day instead of at night when he knew Chan was going to doze off.

He apparently stayed silent for too long because Changbin kept going. “I’d like to know why my own best friend is ignoring me if not to ask about your sleeping schedule and why the fuck he is sleeping his days away and staying awake during the night,” Changbin pushed, clearly angry at Chan for having done something to his best friend even if he still didn’t know what.

“Why not asking him?” Chan mumbled, knowing all too well that Changbin was probably going to punch him right on the nose if he were to actually tell him what he had said and done to the younger.

“Oh, because I did. And you know what he said?” Changbin questioned mockingly. “He said that he won’t sleep when he knows you are,” he answered his own question, “and when I asked him why, he simply said it’s how things are now.”

Changbin took a step closer to Chan, before walking to the window instead and opening the curtains to let the warm sunlight wash away the darkness of the room. Chan didn’t like the change as his eyes hadn’t seen the sunlight in around three weeks but he knew better than to make Changbin angrier.

“Now care to explain what the fuck you did to him to make him avoid you even in his  _ sleep _ ?” Changbin asked calmly, his words cutting more deeply than any blade could. As Changbin set down on the desk chair and stared right at Chan, the older understood that there was no way to get away with this.

Chan set up straight on the bed and cleared his throat. “We got into an argument,” he simply stated, the imagines of that night flashing in front of his eyes.

“Thank you, genius. I couldn’t imagine that,” Changbin said sarcastically, his words still meant to let Chan know he was angry at him for whatever he did to Felix. Chan figured he deserved it.

“I used what he told me about his father against him and he said he doesn’t want anything to do with me,” Chan confessed, choking on the strong emotions his heart couldn’t handle right now.

“Why did you do that?” Changbin asked, anger shining through every single bit of his body. “It took  _ years _ for him to open up about it with me, how can you just take it so lightly?” he kept going, feeling defensive over his best friend, now understanding how hurt Felix actually was and the reason behind his cold behaviour.

“I didn’t mean to and I regret every single word I said to him that day,” Chan rushed out, just wanting to scream out everything he was feeling. “I was just so angry and so hurt and I know it isn’t an excuse and I know I've lost all his trust and I know, I know, I know. But he won’t pick up my calls or answer my texts. His soul doesn’t even materialise in my dreams anymore and I don’t know what to do. I can’t lose him, Changbin, I can’t.” Chan sobbed, all the sadness he had kept in now exploding as the words left his mouth.

“You had no right to use such a traumatic experience for him just to win this argument you had,” Changbin began, his tone softening at how wrecked Chan looked. “And I can understand why Felix doesn’t want to see you right now,” he continued as Chan left out an even louder sob, “but I also don’t know what has happened between you two so it’s not right for me to blame you just because you hurt him.”

Chan’s body was shaking, tears streaming down his cheeks like waterfalls. “I don’t know what to do, I don’t know what to do,” he kept repeating, guilt making bile rise to his throat.

“I'll help,” Changbin suddenly said after a moment of silence, “but you have to promise me you’re going to apologize and not start any other argument with him, okay? Otherwise, if this doesn’t work out, he’s going to be mad at me too and he’s already ignoring me now.”

Chan snapped his head up so quickly that he felt dizzy for a second. Changbin, Felix’s best friend, the one he was sure was going to punch him for hurting Felix, was now willing to help. 

He couldn’t reply fast enough. 

“I promise. I just want all of this to be over,” Chan assured, blinking away the fresh tears forming in his eyes.

“I’m going to tell him that I'm at yours and keeping you busy so he can go to sleep without risking the whole dream thing. From what I've got, he doesn’t sleep at night to avoid it so he’s probably dead tired,” Changbin explained, frowning at the thought of how unhealthy Felix’s habits had started to become.

“And you’re going to sleep too, so hopefully you two will meet,” he finished, proud of the plan he had come up with on the spot.

“You’re really going to do it?” Chan asked hopefully.

“As much as I hate what you did, I can tell how much you two care for each other. I'm not going to sit here, watching you two die of heartbreak when I can help,” Changbin said with determination, patting Chan on the back as he got up from the chair.

“Thank you, Changbin, really. I was sure you were going to punch me for what I’ve done,” Chan half-joked, trying to bring up his own mood a bit. He finally had a chance to make things better now and he couldn’t keep feeling sorry for himself, letting the opportunity pass by.

“Oh, believe me, I wanted to,” Changbin smirked, a dangerous spark lighting up his eyes, “but I figured that a broken nose wasn’t what you needed now.”

Chan chuckled wary, knowing that Changbin wasn’t joking at all. All of their friends knew how Changbin became a beast when anyone hurt his friends and when it came to Felix, it was even worse because the older knew he couldn’t do much because of the distance.

“I’m going to text him now,” Changbin announced, fishing his phone out of the pocket of his jeans, “you try to get some sleep. I will be in the living room if you need anything.” Changbin smiled at the older before he softly closed the door behind him and left the room in the silence Chan had got so used to.

Chan lied down again and closed his eyes, the rollercoaster of emotions he was feeling making it hard for him to fall asleep immediately. The light was still illuminating the whole room and he could feel the expectation of falling asleep growing, making it even harder to do that.

As his senses started to become drowsy, the last thing he hoped for was that Felix was just as tired as Changbin said he was and followed his best friend’s advice.

...

Chan woke up to a soft pull on his ankle and when he opened his eyes, he almost teared up with relief. There was something in the air that told him that he was not awake, something that had been once so familiar but now needed some getting used to.

Felix was still nowhere to be seen but Chan knew that if his soul had woken up there, it only meant that Felix’s own was going to do the same too, as soon as Felix was deep enough in sleep. A sudden breeze moved his curtains and, when he took notice of the fact that the window in his room was closed, he knew what to expect.

In the blink of an eye, Felix’s body materialised in the middle of the room, his eyes still closed, probably waking up for the sleep his body had fallen in. Chan watched as Felix looked around the room with his brows furrowed until his eyes landed on Chan and horror painted itself on his face.

“No, no, no,” Felix whispered quickly, moving backwards until his back was pressed to the door. Chan's heart broke a bit more at the look of pure panic on Felix’s face at the simple realisation of being in front of him again.

Chan stayed silent for a second more, simply appreciating seeing the boy again after three weeks of radio silence. What Chan had not thought about was how Felix had apparently learnt how to force his body to wake up so that his soul could escape the dream. 

“Felix, wake up. Come on,” Felix whispered to himself, squeezing his eyes shut and hoping to open them again in his own bedroom in Australia, kilometres away from this.

Not making the same mistake twice, Chan shot up from his bed, taking Felix’s wrist in his hand in order to ground him to the dream.

“Please, don’t,” Chan whispered just as quietly, having no intention of raising his voice with Felix this time. “Hear me out, please. If you still want to leave then, I won’t force you to stay. But please let me explain,” he pleaded, a new wave of tears slowly making its way down his cheeks.

Felix suppressed a sob of his own at the situation, Chan's words still burning under his skin. When he opened his eyes and found himself face to face with Chan's desperate expression, the older looking on the verge of a breakdown, something snapped in Felix. If Chan had been unfair to him, it didn’t mean that Felix had to behave in the same way.

“Why am I here? Changbin-hyung told me he was keeping you busy,” Felix started, pulling away from Chan's hold on his wrist. The action wasn’t angry as Chan had expect it to be but Felix was still moving away from him.

“He offered to help. There was no other way for me to get to talk to you,” Chan explained, staring at the empty spot Felix was standing in just seconds before. When he turned around, the boy was sitting on his desk chair, waiting for him. The older took it as a good sign and with uncertain steps, he moved to his bed, sitting down on the edge of it.

“I had no right in saying the things I did,” Chan started, inhaling shakingly to take time and organise his thoughts. In the long days he was waiting for Felix to malterliase in his dreams, he had come up with different speeches, all of them to convince the younger to forgive me. But now that he was face to face with Felix’s sad eyes, all those words were forgotten, stuck in his throat.

“You had not,” Felix agreed, no particular emotion with his words. Chan figured it was good that he couldn’t hear anger in his voice at least.

“And I have no right to ask you to trust me again or to forgive me in the first place,” Chan continued, his eyes staring at the floor, too scared to look at Felix. “I am just so scared to lose you, Felix, just as your mother is. I was so fixated with the idea of you moving here that, when you told me it was not going to happen, my whole world crashed down,” he confessed, his voice growing smaller with each word.

As much as Felix’s wanted to cry at how sad Chan looked and just wanted to hug his pain away, he was suffering too and it was only right for Chan to fully understand what he had done and the pain he had caused him. “I’ve never said it wasn’t going to happen, I just asked you for some more time,” Felix pointed out, his voice surprisingly steady, even though his chest was aching.

“I know you did, I know that now. But when you told me that, to my ears it sounded like you had given up already. I've waited so long for you, Felix. You make me so happy that I am terrified of the idea of losing you now that I’ve finally found you,” Chan continued, his words accompanied with the tears dropping on the carpeted floor.

Felix’s could feel his own joining in. “That’s the problem, Chris. You keep saying that you’ve waited so long for me as if it is my fault. As if I could have done something to make you suffer less,” Felix countered, finally voicing all the things he had wanted to say before their last conversation went downhill.

“That’s not what I mean—” Chan started, just to be silenced.

“Please let me talk,” Felix interrupted, more gently than he had thought. “You told me I will never understand how unfair it is for me to ask you to wait some more. But what I think  _ you  _ don’t understand is that I’ve spent every single day of my life afraid that my mark was going to hurt me, afraid that no matter what, my fate was going to be the same as my mother’s. I've waited and waited, hoping every day that it was not going to be like that. When I found you, I thought that things were really going to be different, that I could have hope for our future.” Felix let out, his gaze never weavering from staring straight at Chan, whose sobbs had become even louder. 

But Felix wasn’t done. 

“That’s until you asked me to choose between my soulmate and my family. I trusted you with my past, with what happened with my father, just to have you saying that we’re going to end up like them anyways. And that’s just because I asked you for some more goddamn time to convince my mother,” now Felix’s voice had grown sharper, his previous anger swept away by disappointment.

Disappointment at those promises Chan had made him, disappointment at the future plans they had together, disappointment at how Chan hadn’t even tried to understand him.

The silence in the room grew tenser as Felix felt drained and Chan was still sobbing. 

“I’m so sorry, Felix, I’m so fucking sorry,” Chan kept saying with his head buried in his hands. “I was so selfish, I only saw things from my perspective and didn’t think of how hard it was for you, too. I was a jerk and I ruined everything before we could even get a proper chance to start and I don’t deserve to be forgiven. But I don’t want to lose you, Lix. I  _ can’t  _ lose you,” Chan wailed, all the sadness and hatred for himself coming to crush down on his shoulders.

Felix’s tears silently fell from his eyes and he couldn’t resist the urge to get closer to Chan, not even now. Kneeling down in front of the bed, Felix gently removed Chan's hands from his face, just to bury his own head in the crook on Chan's neck, feeling the older do the same a second later. 

Chan's cries grew louder at the feeling of being in Felix’s arms again, the thought of not deserving any of that ringing in his head. As if Felix had heard his thoughts, he wrapped one arm around Chan's middle while the other came to rest on the back of his head, gently caressing his skin.

“It’s okay, we’re okay,” Felix kept whispering, effectively making Chan's sobs quiet down even though his body was still shaking. Felix’s own tears still wet his cheeks but the closeness was helping him too.

As much as Chan had hurt him in a way he had never been hurt before, Felix couldn’t ignore his own feelings, the need to have the older closer growing stronger day after day. No matter what, Chan was still his soulmate and he knew that he couldn't give up on them just because of a single mistake.

After a few more minutes, when Chan's hands had shakily wrapped around Felix’s body too and they felt like they could finally breathe again, Felix pulled away, taking Chan's face in both his hands to make the older look at him straight in the eyes.

“I just need you to understand that we’re in this together and we can’t hold things in until one of us explode. Moving here is a big decision and I just need to think things through before throwing myself in it, okay?” Felix said gently, trying to put the doubts he knew Chan had in his mind to silence. “I want to be with you too. You know that, right?” he asked for confirmation, his sad heart making a jump at the small pull on the corners of Chan's lips at the words.

“I know,” Chan confirmed breaking eye contact, “I’m sorry.”

Felix brought his face up again. “It's okay,” he assured.

Chan smiled sadly, shaking his head, “No, it’s not.”

Felix moved his head forward until their foreheads were touching and their noses rubbed together. “Maybe it’s not, but we’ll work with what we’ve got,” Felix said with determination, bringing Chan forward into a kiss.

The usual softness was replaced by a bitter feeling none of them could quite put a finger on. Maybe things weren’t working in the way they had hoped for and maybe not everything was going to be as easy as other couples had it. But they were still working on it and they were doing it together.

When their souls rejoined their bodies the next morning, the bitter sight of tears on their cheeks didn’t leave them. However, the warmness on their collarbone, right where their mark was, was a pleasant surprise and they were both overwhelmed by a feeling they hadn’t felt in so, so long.

_ Hope _ . 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY JISUNG AND FELIX DAYS! <3
> 
> Click [here](https://twitter.com/Felixfrckls/status/1228374089863192585?s=19) for the comic version of the story by @komix.by.3d!  
[This](https://twitter.com/felixfrckls/status/1310260364278464512?s=20) is how the soulmate marks look like!  
Twitter: @[felixfrckls](https://twitter.com/Felixfrckls)  
CC: [felixfrckls](https://curiouscat.me/felixfrckls)
> 
> I hope you liked this chapter eheheh! Hopefully, I will post the last chapter on Wednesday so look forward to it uwu ^.^


	4. Fourth Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I haven’t given up yet,” Felix suddenly said, confidence dripping from his voice, “I'm still trying to convince my mother to let me come here.”

Slowly but surely, things between Chan and Felix started to get better. 

Neither of them could forget what had happened but both were willing to take a step forward and set that as an example of how things should never be between them.

Their texts and calls had become a regular occurrence again as they feel back into that routine they both knew so well. Felix had also made sure to apologize to Changbin for ignoring him when he wasn’t even supposed to be involved in the mess whatsoever. As much as Chan pretended not to notice it at first, he soon realised that the dreams they shared had started to become rarer as time passed by, the two meeting once every two weeks if they were lucky.

Chan had thought of different reasons behind that but he couldn’t erase from his mind the words Jisung had used all those months ago when he had explained to him that soulmates didn’t have rules. Jisung had said that it was all about fate and Chan had had a bad feeling ever since he fully understood what that meant. Before sharing his thoughts with Felix, he decided to talk to Jisung once again since the boy seemed to know more about soulmates than either he or Felix ever will.

Once he had his confirmation, he finally decided to break the news out to Felix, hoping that the younger had noticed that something was weird too. A week later, when their souls were lucky to meet during the night after almost ten whole days of not seeing each other, Chan carefully introduced the topic.

“Have you been sleeping well lately?” Chan asked, looking up to the boy who was holding him.

Chan had his chin pinned on Felix’s chest as the younger had wrapped an arm around his shoulders. Their intertwined fingers played together on the mattress.

“I have. I actually wanted to ask you the same question,” Felix replied and Chan understood that the younger was confused about their not-as-frequent meetings too but, unlike Chan, he didn’t have anyone to share his worries with besides him. 

“So you have noticed that we don’t meet as often anymore?” Chan asked just for clarification, wanting to be sure that the younger was okay with the topic before saying anything more.

“I have, but it’s exam season for you so I thought that you were just staying awake more at night to have more time to study,” Felix explained, as his eyes locked with Chan's. “That’s not it, right?”

Felix could see nervousness and sadness written all over Chan's face and he paid more attention to the conversation as he understood that it wasn’t just a matter of not sleeping well.

Something else was going on and apparently Chan knew about it.

“It’s not,” Chan agreed. “When I started noticing it, I was afraid something was going on because of what happened the last time we didn’t meet here for so long. Then, when nothing seemed wrong between us, I came up with a theory but I wanted to make sure of it before talking to you,” he warned the boy who was carefully listening to him.

“What is it?” Felix asked sitting up, making Chan move from his chest as well. Chan could feel the tension radiate from Felix’s body so, as he moved to get in a more comfortable position, he took Felix's hand back in his, rubbing soft circle on it with his thumb.

“I talked to Jisung and, apparently, these meetings happen because we are soulmates forced apart. But they are not forever, they are just some sort of reminder that fate wants us together but won’t do all the work,” Chan explained, knowing that, for someone who knew so little about soulmates as both he and Felix did, it wasn’t an easy concept to grasp.

“So does this mean that these dreams will become rarer as time passes by until they stop altogether? Until we are physically close again, we won’t meet each other in this way?” Felix asked, even though he could get the answer himself just by looking at Chan’s sad expression.

The atmosphere in the room had become tenser, both of them knowing what the announcement meant for them. If they hadn’t found a way to be physically close again, then they would have to live their lives like any normal couple forced apart by distance, relying on texts and phone calls as the only way to be in contact.

“I'm afraid so,” Chan said quietly, rubbing on Felix’s knee with his other hand to try comforting him in the slightest. Tears were starting to collect in Felix’s eyes and Chan hated how he was the reason why Felix had been crying so much lately. “But it’s okay, we still get to call. We just need to get used to not having this anymore,” Chan reassured, the hand tightly holding Felix's moving between them.

They had been very lucky to have those months to spend together during the night, making them feel like they still had something to hold on to despite everything. Now that it was time to part ways and keep living their lives as they did before, it felt like a piece of them was ripped apart from their beings.

Felix nodded pitifully, as a mix of emotions flashed in his eyes. He pulled Chan closer until they were hugging again, now fully aware that this wasn’t going to happen as often as they were used to. 

Seconds later, all too soon for Felix’s liking, Chan pulled away. He silently stood up from the bed to make his way to one of the drawers located beside his desk.

“I want to give you something,” Chan started with his back still turned to Felix. “I don’t know if this is going to work but I want to try since we don’t know when we’ll to see each other again,” he said, his shoulders tense and his tone bitter at the words coming out of his mouth.

He didn’t want to make Felix think that he was pressuring him in any way since the chance of them being together was something they both had hoped for but had turned out into a huge disaster.

The words Chan used were nothing but the sad truth.

Chan turned around and walked towards where he had been just minutes before and set down on the bed again. This time he was holding something in his hands and Felix moved from his position too so he could look him in the eyes.

“On September 2nd, exactly three months ago, we made pancakes together and I realised you were my soulmate. It still took us a bit more to get to where we are now but that was the day that changed everything for me,” Chan confessed, his voice wavering with the intensity of the emotions he felt for the boy in front of him.

When that day he had felt that warmth on his mark and realised that Felix was meant to be his other half, all those doubts about his future and those three years of waiting started to feel like nothing. Even though their relationship wasn’t as easy as the one between Minho and Changbin or between Hyunjin and Jisung, Chan still felt like meeting Felix was the best thing that could have ever happened to him and he had never forgotten the happiness he felt that day.

Felix was blinking quickly as he stared at him as he tried to hide his tears by quickly drying them on the sleeve of his shirt. Chan could feel his own tears forming and, with shaky hands, he gently gave Felix the little box he was holding.

“Besides, I like to think of that day as our first unofficial date,” Chan joked, even though tears were still rolling down both his and Felix’s cheeks. The younger chuckled at that, not believing that after all this time, Chan still remembered about that day so clearly.

Felix opened up the small velvet box in his hands, letting out a choked sob at the sight of what was inside. There, laid a simple necklace, the beautiful pendant shaped like a sun staring up at him.

“The first time we met, when we went outside of the airport, the sun was shining on you and the first thing I noticed were your freckles. They reminded me so much about our mark that I stayed frozen there until Jisung elbowed me in the ribs,” Chan said chuckling at the fond memory. “And the same thing happened three months ago when you came over for breakfast. As soon as the sun shined on your freckles, my mark heated up and that was when I realised what it meant,” he continued, Felix never averting his eyes from the necklace he was holding, despite his tears falling down on the bed.

“You’re my sunshine, Lix. You were even before either of us realised it. I just want you to be happy, whatever happens, and I will always be thankful to have such an amazing person by my side. I don’t know if when we’ll wake up the necklace will be with you or not but I really wanted to say this now that we’re still together,” Chan finished, quickly blinking away the tears in his eyes.

Felix threw himself in Chan’s arms, careful to put down the box before doing so. No word could express both how happy he was in that moment and how sad he was at the feeling that this chapter of their relationship was coming to an end. Felix buried his head against Chan's neck, inhaling the comforting and familiar scent to impress it in his mind. With the additional weight, Chan had fallen backwards until he was lying in the middle of the bed with Felix on top of him.

Chan didn’t waste a second to wrap his arms tightly around Felix’s waist, enjoying the closeness of their bodies before it was too late.

“I haven’t given up yet,” Felix suddenly said, confidence dripping from his voice, “I'm still trying to convince my mother to let me come here.”

The determination in Felix’s voice made Chan's chest rise with hope. As much as the topic wasn’t too common between them because of what happened last time, Chan had always had this doubt in his mind, not really understanding if Felix had given up on it for the time being or if he was still trying. Felix’s words had unconsciously made a weight rise from his chest and he couldn’t help but hug him even tighter.

“I’m still convinced that if she could only get to know you, she would be more comfortable with the idea,” Felix shared his opinion, as he rubbed his nose on Chan's neck one last time before pulling away. Felix set down, taking the box in his hands again, spacing out as he caressed the pendant.

An idea suddenly struck Chan's mind like a bolt of lightning and the hope in his chest grew just that tiny bit. “She could,” he answered, nervous but determined.

“What?” Felix asked, too focused on the necklace to pay attention to the words.

“She could. Meet me, I mean,” Chan specified as he saw realisation dawn on Felix. “Do you think it could be any help if I talked to her myself?” he asked, smiling genuinely for what felt like the first time in days.

Felix blinked, slowly assimilating Chan's question. “You would really do that?” he asked, his voice small and full of surprise.

Chan chuckled at the sound of it, nodding eagerly. “Lix, if there’s anything I can do to help, I would do it in a heartbeat. Now that I think about it, I honestly don’t know why we didn’t do it before,” he shook his head, both because he was actually surprised he had thought of that only now and also because Felix was really asking him if he would do that, as if Chan's first priority wasn’t making him happy.

Felix leaned forward, cupping Chan's face in his hands and bringing their lips together in a kiss that said more than any of his words could. Chan could read them all through it and he didn’t mind Felix not verbally responding at all.

“Put this on me,” Felix said once they pulled apart in order to catch their breaths. He handed the small box to Chan again, until the older understood what he was referring to and motioned for him to turn around.

When Felix’s back was facing him, he put the necklace around Felix’s neck and quickly secured it until the pendant rested prettily on Felix’s chest. Once he did, Chan leant his head on Felix’s shoulder who still turned away from him and left a peck on the younger’s shoulder, making him melt against his chest.

“If your mother is okay with it, video call me later today. I’ll do my best to assure her that I only want to know you’re doing what makes you happy,” Chan whispered in his ear, resting his arms around Felix’s waist from behind.

Felix shivered at both the feeling of Chan's breath against his sensitive neck and the force of his words. Chan sounded so sincere and sure of what he was saying that Felix couldn’t resist turning his body around just to let their lips meet once again.

The kiss shared between them all those things they wanted to make sure the other knew before they were forced apart, fate helping them until a certain point but leaving them to do the work from that moment on.

The feeling they had started to dread slowly made their skin tingle. Chan blinked repeatedly, yawning as soon as their lips pulled apart, while Felix felt that familiar pull on his arm trying to drag his soul back to his body. They both knew what that meant and they both shared one last meaningful glance and a whispered _ later _ before their bodies drifted apart.

Felix’s hand shoot up the moment he realised where he was, blinking the sleep away from his eyes as they focused on the furniture in his own bedroom, back in Australia. When he didn’t feel any weight resting on his chest, his hand desperately trying to find the necklace Chan had given him, he started to tear up.

_ It didn’t work. _

As he moved to bury his face in his hands, he realised that his left hand was tightly clenching around something cold. He shakily opened his hand to reveal that same necklace he had around his neck, now in his palm, the pendant staring up at him as Chan's words echoed in his mind.

_ You’re my sunshine, Lix. You were even before either of us realised it. _

Felix wondered if the hope bubbling in his chest was meant to give him strength or destroy him altogether.

…

That “later” arrived and after a text from Chan and a long, long conversation with his mum, Felix had convinced her to talk to the older. If she still was against the idea of Felix moving, then there was nothing else they could do but at least they could be sure to have tried their best. Despite the obvious reason for the call, Chan was till someone Felix wanted his mother to meet.

They were currently sitting at the kitchen counter, with Felix’s laptop in front of them and his mother staring at it like she wanted to make it blow up. The ringtone echoed in the room and Felix was quick to answer it while his mother seemed to tense up even more. Chan was no better and, even though the image was pixelated, Felix could still see how tense his shoulders were.

“Hey, Chris,” Felix greeted, breaking the silence, noticing how his own voice sounded more nervous than he had thought.

“Hey, Lix,” Chan said back, not sure if he should say something to Felix’s mum too or not. Luckily, Felix saved him from the embarrassment.

“Mum, this is Chan –or Chris, whatever you prefer. Chris, this is my mother,” Felix introduced the two as he gently squeezed his mom’s hand resting on her knee.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Ms Lee,” Chan politely said, trying to break the ice since the woman seemed to be silent.

“It’s a pleasure indeed,” Felix’s mother finally said and Felix seemed relieved at how genuine her words actually sounded.

“So,” Felix cleared his throat awkwardly, “I’m going to leave you two alone.” Felix got up from the chair, leaning in just to address Chan one last time. “I’m going to call you again later if that’s okay,” he said, clearly planning to talk to Chan about the conversation he was not going to be part of.

“Of course,” Chan answered in a heartbeat, smiling softly at the other. Before Felix could fully pull away from the screen, already turning to his mother, Chan saw something around Felix’s neck, recognising what it was when he focused on the pendant resting on his chest. “The necklace...it worked!” Chan exclaimed, warmth and hope sparkling in his heart at the familiar sight.

Felix blinked up at him, now realising what he meant. “It did,” he confirmed smiling brightly, “I woke up this morning and I had it with me.”

Knowing that it was a conversation that could wait, they both silently agreed to talk about it later as Felix’s mother kept moving his eyes from staring at the necklace and then at Chan.

“Behave,” Felix whispered to his mother like she was a child before dropping a kiss on her cheek and making his way out of the frame, probably out of the room altogether.

Before either Chan or the woman could start talking, Chan's phone vibrated with a text, a short _ good luck <3 _that made him smile despite the tense situation.

“Felix talks about you a lot,” Ms Lee started, watching the screen carefully as to imprint Chan in her mind. Despite how cold she sounded, Chan was relieved she was the one to talk first.

“He talks about you a lot, too,” Chan answered without thinking. He almost facepalmed at how dumb his words sounded, “you’re his mom, of course, he talks about you.”

That made the corners of the woman’s mouth pull up a little, realising how nervous Chan actually was to be face to face with her.

“I'm going to be honest with you. I don’t like the idea of you coming into Felix’s life and, all of a sudden, making him move to the other side of the world,” the woman started straightforwardly, not beating around the bush.

As much as Chan had promised to himself to keep calm and to never act disrespectfully in any way, he was there to make sure that the woman knew both parts of the story and the words she had used sounded extremely wrong to his ears. 

“With all due respect, I don’t think Felix was the one who said I am making him do things he isn’t okay with. He’s free to decide for himself, I would never force him into anything he isn’t comfortable with,” Chan felt the need to specify, knowing that his choice of words wasn’t exactly a great start since they didn’t sound as polite as he had hoped for.

For a fraction of a second, Felix’s mother looked pleasantly surprised before her expression turned apathetic again. Chan found comfort in that single second that she had not been able to control her feelings.

“You’re right, Felix has never used those words himself,” the woman confirmed easily, clearly letting Chan understand that she was testing him and at least for now, he had passed.

“I'm sure that, at this point, Felix has told you about his father. What he did to me, what he did to _ us _,” Ms Lee said and Chan knew she wasn’t joking around with pointless tests anymore.

“He has,” Chan confirmed, not knowing what else to say.

“My son loves you, you know? I can see it in the way he talks about you, in the way he looks at you even through a screen,” the woman revealed. It was something that Chan had had in the back of his mind for a really long time, those three words threatening to leave his lips so often when he was around Felix.

“And I can see the same things in you too,” Felix’s mother continued, unreadable emotions flashing in her eyes. Chan thought he could recognise nostalgia mixed with fear.

“I do. I love him,” Chan confessed and, even though he had never said those words out loud, it sounded like there wasn’t anything he was more sure of. “Not because he is my soulmate. I love him for the person he is and for the person I am when I’m with him,” he continued, clearing up every doubt the woman could have about the nature of their relationship.

If Felix’s mum was doubtful about their future together, there was no word he could say to reassure her. But one thing he wanted to make sure of was that she knew how deeply in love he was with her son and how he cherished every single second they got to spend together. 

That was something he didn’t allow doubts about.

“When I met my children’s father, we were deeply in love too but we all know how things turned out. Felix is ready to leave his family, his friends and his education to be with you. You have to understand that I'm worried for him, for you too,” Ms Lee finally laid out all the cards, revealing to Chan all her insecurities using the tone of a mother, worried for her children.

Chan was left speechless.

He had never thought about the fact that the woman was not only worried about her son but about his sake, too. If things between them didn’t work out, just as Felix’s mother was so scared of, it wasn’t going to hurt Felix only but Chan as well. The boy felt a rush of tears to his eyes, thinking about how he had blamed the woman for so long while she was just looking after them both.

“Ms Lee, I can’t promise you that Felix will have his happy ever after, that our relationship will last forever or that we will never hurt each other emotionally,” Chan started, keeping his tone gentle and reassuring. “What I can promise you is something I promised Felix a long time ago. As long as he will let me stay by his side, I will never leave, whether it is as a friend or a lover,” Chan promised for the second time, his determined tone contrasting the tears that were slowly falling down his eyes.

It was his only chance to make the woman understand how deeply he cared for Felix and how much he just wanted to know that the boy was happy, with or without him.

Ms Lee’s expression had long lost its coldness to leave space to a motherly smile at the sight of Chan in front of her. “You’re a good guy, Chan. I’m glad Felix has you,” she said and to Chan, it sounded like the best melody in the world.

“I’m glad to have him too,” he whispered, still loud enough to be heard over the call. It felt like they had reached a mutual understanding as Chan didn’t dare to push for a straightforward answer.

Ms Lee smiled softly at him, feeling reassured by the outcome of the conversation they had. “I need to thank you for making the effort to talk to me yourself, it means a lot. I will think about it now that I know better how things are,” the woman said and, even though it wasn’t a confirmation, it still left Chan feeling has hopeful as he had ever been.

“Of course, I understand,” he agreed and a few minutes later the screen went dark.

Now all he had to do was wait.

…

With unsure steps, Felix made his way to the kitchen when he couldn’t hear more words shared between his mother and Chan. Like the good son he was, he had not tried to spy on them in any ways, staying instead in his room to let them talk it out themselves. He knew that with him in the room they were probably not going to fully say what they thought and he was also aware that if he had been there, he himself would have stepped in if he disagreed on something. 

He didn’t know what he had expected when he came face to face with his mother again but it surely wasn’t her looking into nothing with a fond smile on her lips. He figured that it must be a good sign but he was still confused, even more so when she didn’t even seem to notice his presence.

“Mum? Is everything...okay?” he asked gently, not wanting to scare her out of her daze.

She slowly turned towards him, that smile never leaving her lips. As Felix stayed silent watching her, she got up until she was in front of him.

“He’s a good guy,” she started and Felix could feel his chest rising with pride at both Chan and his mother. They had apparently talked it out in the best way possible and Felix could see how his mother was clearly more relaxed now that she had a face to associate with Chan’s name.

“He has always been,” Felix agreed, letting the meaning of those words settle, his mother clearly understanding what he was alluding at.

The woman turned serious but that warmth in her eyes never left. “Do you love him?” she asked straightforwardly.

Felix didn’t take a second to think about it as his hand reached the pendant of the necklace he had at his neck.

_ You're my sunshine _

“I do,” Felix confirmed, nodding surely at the words on his lips.

His mother stared at him, at the way his usually shy appearance was replaced by confidence, at the way his words sounded like the most honest truth he had ever said, at the way he was playing with his necklace as his life depended on it. But above all, at the hope written all over his face, hope for his mother to finally understand.

She sighed. “I'm willing to let you attend those two years of university in Korea as you had planned,” she finally said, “if after those two years, you still want to stay there, we can discuss it later. For now, do your best to assure me I chose the right thing.”

Felix felt the world spinning on his axis at that simple sentence. Months of planning, of arguing with Chan, of feeling like his mother would never understand him came to an end with such a simple phrase. He didn’t know if he wanted to laugh, to cry or to pass out altogether.

“Lix, you need to breathe,” his mother reminded him chuckling.

Apparently he had opted for passing out because, he only then realised, he had held his breath ever since his mother had finished talking, making his whole face go bright red. He couldn’t believe his own ears but the comforting smile on his mother’s face made him understand that it was real, that he was really going to do it.

“Are you sure? Are you really okay with it?” Felix asked question after question just to make sure that his mother wasn’t pulling a sick prank on him.

“Are you trying to make me change my mind?” Ms Lee joked. She only had the time to let that out before Felix threw his whole body at her, hugging her so tightly that her face went red just as her son’s.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” he continued to repeat until he had said it so many times that the words sounded weird to his ears.

“That’s enough or we’re both going to pass out,” she said, hugging her son to her chest nevertheless, “now go tell your boyfriend the news so that you can tell me all about that pretty necklace of yours once you’re done.” His mother had this blinding smile on her lips, almost as if she was as happy as Felix himself was. 

If Felix thought about it, she probably was.

The boy didn’t waste a second before running to the kitchen to take his laptop and going straight to his bedroom again, flopping down on the bed and calling Chan all in one swift motion.

He felt his heart beating as he had just run a marathon, so overjoyed that he didn’t know if he was going to explode at any second now. Chan quickly picked up the call, probably both confused as to why Felix was calling him so suddenly and still calming his nerves after the call with Felix’s mother.

When Chan's pixelated face took over his screen, with a question on his lips already, Felix screamed at the top of his lungs.

“SHE SAID YES!”

…

When Felix landed, he took a second to look around. 

Nothing was new since he had been there several times before, but everything felt different this time. The luggage he had with himself didn’t contain clothes for a couple of days anymore and the sight of the people waiting for him didn’t spark that sadness caused by the knowledge of having to leave.

Because Felix didn’t have to leave this time. 

He had two long, long years in front of him. Two years to spend with his best friends, two years spent studying what he loved but most importantly, two years spent with his soulmate.

The months before his arrival was packed with last-minute-details organisation, going through infinite papers and, at the same time, making sure that his mother was still okay with the idea and was comfortable with him leaving. Felix and Chan hadn’t had too much time to talk during those months and the dreams they shared were rarer than once every four weeks but neither of them could complain. Because even though, they didn’t meat in their dreams as they used to, they had something to look forward to now.

“Felix!” A voice called his name when he had finally emerged from the crowd of people landing with his same flight.

It didn’t take him more than two seconds to understand where the voice came from and realise who had called his name. A mop of curly blonde hair moved in the crowd until Felix could clearly see him standing there, staring at him as if he was making sure that he was real, there in flesh and bones.

Felix felt a rush of adrenaline as he carried his huge luggage as quickly as possible, running straight into Chan's arms. It must have been a pretty funny scene but Felix couldn’t care less. Chan's arms wrapped tightly around his body, lifting him up from the ground, as both of them couldn’t help laughing with joy at the realisation that this was finally happening.

“I missed you so much,” Felix whispered in the crook of Chan's neck as neither of them had let go of the other, still tightly holding each other in the middle of passersby giving them strange looks. 

“I missed you, too. God, I can’t believe this is real,” Chan mumbled, just for Felix to hear. Months of not seeing each other and the rollercoaster of emotions they had felt before were all combining in the need to be close, to never let go.

Apparently, someone behind them didn’t agree as they cleared their throat loudly. “Look at you, the last time you were here I was the first one you hugged and now you don't even realise we’re here,” Changbin said, clearly joking but still doing his best to fake an offended expression. The effect was completely ruined by the sparkle in his eyes.

They could hear Chan saying something along the lines of _ soulmates privileges _before Felix let out a sound that vaguely reminded them of a velociraptor and pulled away from Chan to throw himself in his best friend’s arms. Felix had missed him incredibly much too, just as he had missed all the friends he had made during the weeks he had spent there last time.

“It’s good to have you here again, Lix,” Changbin said, hugging the boy tightly. 

Felix laughed heartily in his neck, “it’s really good to be here.”

Knowing that where Chan and Changbin went, so did Jisung, he turned to his right to find an expectant looking Jisung who was smiling from ear to ear.

“Sungie!”

“Lix!”

They said at the same time before their bodies met in a hug so tight that their friends wondered if they were still breathing.

Felix felt over the moon, even more so when Chan walked to his side to intertwine their fingers together as it was the most natural thing ever. Maybe it was.

“What’s the plan for today?” Felix asked excitedly, jumping on the balls of his feet as if he hadn’t just landed after a thirteen-hours long flight.

Chan, Changbin and Jisung laughed at his energy. “The plan is for you to unpack your things and possibly take a nap before you collapse,” Changbin replied sassily, not knowing how Felix could be up for anything besides sleeping at the moment.

“You’re so not fun,” Felix pouted but blushed when his words were punctuated with a big yawn. “By the way, you never told me where I'm staying,” he pointed out as all four of them walked to find the exit from the airport.

Chan's fingers were still tightly interlocked with Felix’s and the younger felt the need to drop a kiss on his boyfriend’s hand, without any special reason, just for the pleasure of feeling the older close. Chan blushed but a pleased smile made its way on his lips as he leaned down to drop a kiss of his own on Felix’s temple.

They were both giggling at each other like fools, forgetting about what Felix had said just minutes before. “Gross,” both Changbin and Jisung said at the same time. They were awful actors because both of them had a fond smile on their lips at the sight of their friends being finally happy together.

They knew how hard it was for Chan to open up about soulmates when he had waited for so long for his and Changbin knew about Felix’s struggles with his father. They couldn’t wait to start this new chapter of their lives with all four of them happily in love at the same time.

“As much as I love you and you love me, I don’t think you want to stay at Minho and mine’s apartment,” Changbin started where he left off, winking suggestively at the younger, “and the same goes for Hyunjin and Jisung’s.”

In the months after Felix had last visited, some things had changed. Minho and Changbin had finally moved in together after the older was hinting at it for way longer than that. With Hyunjin and Jisung, it was easier, the change coming naturally as soon as Jisung had got his mark.

“But Chan has plenty of space,” Changbin finished, his words teasing but serious at the same time.

As much as Felix was never going to admit it, he had felt slightly hurt at the fact that Chan had never offered him to stay at his place. Of course, he had soon realised that Chan had all the rights to not feel ready or feel overwhelmed by the possibility so Felix had always kept quiet about it.

“That is if you’re okay with it, of course,” Chan quickly added, letting the implication reach Felix before saying anything more.

Being with Chan in Korea for two years sounded like the best opportunity he could have asked for but _ living _with Chan during that time almost made him feel dizzy.

“Are you sure?” Felix couldn’t help but ask, forgetting for a second that their friends were still around them. 

Chan smile couldn’t grow any bigger as he placed another kiss on Felix’s forehead, “never been more sure in my life.”

Felix’s smile matched Chan's as he broke in the brightest beam Chan had ever seen and, all of a sudden, he was reminded of why he called Felix his sunshine. The freckles on Felix’s face stood out more in the sunshine of the parking lot and, as Chan's mark heated up, he was thrown back to almost a year ago when in the exact same situation, he had just met Felix.

Only that, this time, Felix’s mark started to grow hotter together with his, his smile only becoming bigger at the feeling they had missed in the past months they hadn’t seen each other.

The car drive to Chan's apartment was anything but silent, four voices ringing loudly one over the other as slowly they all came to the realization that Felix was there, the excitement that it caused making them even louder than they usually were.

As much as Felix didn’t like to admit that Changbin was right, he was dead tired and it didn’t take long for him to start yawning and blinking slowly. Jisung and Changbin had made themselves comfortable in Chan's apartment too once they had reached it but as they saw the younger so exhausted, they both decided to let the couple alone for a few hours. 

With quick goodbyes and the promise to meet soon, Changbin and Jisung left, leaving Chan and Felix alone in the older boy’s apartment.

“I missed this place, it feels like it’s been ages since I was here last time,” Felix yawned as he looked around the house.

“It _ has _been a pretty long while actually,” Chan said, moving closer to Felix who was standing in the middle of the living room.

Chan put his hands on both sides of Felix’s neck, cherishing the closeness now that they were finally alone. Felix looked at him with sleepy eyes but the fondness in them was still more than clear. The younger looped his arms around Chan's middle, moving even closer if that was possible.

“Hey there, love,” Chan whispered, his voice not needing to get any louder for Felix to hear him in the quiet room.

“Hey yourself,” Felix answered just as quietly.

Chan didn’t need more time to make up his mind and finally joined their lips together in the kiss that signed the beginning of their journey together. It wasn’t technically the first time they kissed but this felt different than how it did in their dreams. Everything in those was a hint for them to remember that they weren’t awake, each thing they felt during those nights was almost held back.

As if only the reality could make them feel the full extent of their feelings.

Felix had to pull away as another yawn escaped his lips, blushing bright red when it was over. Chan chuckled fondly, his lips swollen and his eyes so full of love, “let’s get you in bed, sleepyhead.”

The part of the house Felix knew better was the bedroom and he was hit with a sense of nostalgia as he entered to find it exactly as it was the last time their souls had shared a dream. Chan must have noticed his uncertainty because he wrapped him in a hug from behind, nuzzling his head in the crook of Felix’s neck who was still looking around the bedroom as if it was the most beautiful piece of art.

“Are you okay?” Chan asked softly, already guessing what was going on in Felix’s mind because he felt the same every time he realised that the Felix in his house wasn’t part of a dream anymore. 

“I’ve just missed you so much. I missed all of this too,” Felix quietly confessed, intertwining his fingers with the ones resting on his stomach.

When Felix seemed to have relaxed from the flood of emotions, Chan gently pushed him towards the bed. “Come on, you really need a nap,” Chan said, soon following the younger who had laid in bed without a second thought.

Felix had his head pillowed on Chan's chest as the older carded his fingers through his blonde hair. As Chan's fingers made their way down to caress his neck, he stopped at the feeling of cold metal under his fingertips.

Chan smile at the ceiling when he realised what it was. “You’re still wearing the necklace,” he pointed out with no intention in particular. His heart was so full that he just wanted to giggle and hold Felix close for every single second they had together.

“Of course,” Felix snapped his head up, his tone almost sounding offended at the thought of Chan thinking he had got rid of the necklace. “I've never taken it off since the moment you put it on me,” he said proudly, clenching his hand around the pendant as if he wanted to protect it.

Chan stared at him, at the boy he had wanted to hold close for so long and now was there, at the boy who had forgiven even the worst of his mistake and was ready to welcome him with open arms again. 

At the boy he loved.

“I love you so much, sunshine,” Chan whispered, overwhelmed by the amount of love he could feel for a single person.

The confession had always been clear in each of his actions but it had never been said out loud. The words waiting to escape until they knew things were going to be okay, now that they were together and were not going to leave each other sides, just as they had promised.

Feeling happiness overtake his body, Felix didn’t tear up as he whispered those words back, “I love you so much too, Chan. So, so much.” 

Felix was smiling from ear to ear as Chan covered that smile with his lips, the feeling of each other pressed close and the confession now ringing in the air making them never want to pull apart.

From that day on, as they laid close every night and their marks burnt up against their skin, Felix came to a realisation. The fact that their souls had met to spend their nights together when their bodies couldn’t, was something he was always going to be thankful for because it led them to where they were now.

Because it taught him that nothing could feel better than falling asleep in the arms of his soulmate, just to wake up the next morning with warm brown eyes looking at him lovingly and even warmer fingers caressing the mark they shared.

They had waited for so long but now time didn’t scare them anymore.

Nothing ever could as long as they had the other by their side, just like they had promised.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Click [here](https://twitter.com/Felixfrckls/status/1228374089863192585?s=19) for the comic version of the story by @komix.by.3d!  
[This](https://twitter.com/felixfrckls/status/1310260364278464512?s=20) is how the soulmate marks look like!  
I'm so sad to see this story end :( But I'm also really proud and thankful to each one of you who took some of their time to read this <3  
In particular, I wanna thank @hotelfelixxie for always being so supportive and @Liolalisa for being the first one who read the chapters and helped me out so much...love you guys <3  
I hope you stick around for the next chanlix as well which, by the way, I'm already working on eheheh!  
Have a great day ^.^
> 
> My Twitter: [felixfrckls](https://twitter.com/Felixfrckls)  
My CC: [felixfrckls](https://curiouscat.me/felixfrckls)


End file.
